|
2005-01-29 12:17:21 ET Do you ever have those moments when you question your true intentions? Your true desire in various environments like life, relationships, etc.? What would be our real needs and wants if we had no one to answer to? No one to make us feel guilty about being selfish... wouldn't that be something. To express what you really want. I don't know about you all but I would definitely not be where I am now with the people I am with now. But is that a good thing to know? To understand that if you didn't have to be someplace in your life you wouldn't be there at all... it kind of trivializes your past existence in a way saying that it wasn't your choice and wasn't what you wanted... Interesting. Well my friend Brian out of the blue started talking to me and it resulted in us getting pretty drunk and dancing to loud rap music blaring from his new system in his Tahoe at 1:45 in the morning with the hot girls accross the street laughing at us. But anyways... I woke up on his couch and was thinking about that first part. "Am I where I want to be... No... then where do you want to be..." and then nothing. That sucks that my drives and desires are so insignificant that not even my subconscious wants to admit them. Oh... I started writing a book and it's going pretty well. Nowhere close to being finished but I do have a path I want to follow for it and strategy for the layout. I have a couple parts finished but it's going to require two bottles of red wine, a large cheese pizza and some Postal Service for me to really try and make a stab at getting some significant writing down. |
