The Apple Analogy
2005-02-28 06:57:11 ET

Sorry for this being so long but just skim through it as you would like...

JEN: "Women are like apples on trees: the best ones are at the top of the tree most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt, Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along- the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree!"
Me: haha
Me: i'm a guy
Me: who wrote that is a girl i bet
JEN: so you really think the ones at the "top" of the tree really want to be there and dont want guys to try
JEN: and you know this because you are a guy?
JEN: haha
Me: they want guys to try but they are all intimidation factor... it's the same as saying that a guy goes for the rotten "easy" ones at the bottom
Me: cuz you are a girl
JEN: what is cuz i am a girkl
Me: well you threw in the "cuz your a guy" when i was trying to categorize the girls at the top... so i threw in the misconception that guys just want the "whores at the bottom of the tree"
JEN: no one said they were whores
JEN: you added that part haha
Me: ....:-\... so if an apple meaning girl is on the ground "rotten and easy" i can't imply that she is a "whore"? when the whole analogy lies on the implication that all guys just want a piece
Me: that's a little unfair by the author of said quote...
JEN: hmm well
Me: but if we are really getting down to analogies... the whole thing is a little too simple with just one apple tree... it should be a whole f'in orchard with the juicy ones near the start... this is the first thing a guy sees and attempts to get... you then have your granny smiths and the yellow ones... these are the more characteristic/personality based girls and the tree is a little taller a little harder to get to... you then have your trees that are just towering... these are the unattainable and when you finally get to them they just aren't worth it... then you have the one tree... and that's the soulmate... i mean there are rotten ones from every tree on the ground but this one perfect tree is the one... and some guys drop off real fast and just chill with the juicy ones and some are always trying to attain the unattainable... but it's the happy ones that make it to the one tree and no one stays for too long with the personality based apples cuz the more and more you get... the weirder they are
Me: but that's just the way i look at the whole thing
JEN: but if that is true then either not everyone has a soulmate or every tree just has one apple and there would be no difference between "good" and "bad" apples
Me: i think "good" and "bad" is up to personal choice when it comes to "apples" and every orchard is different for every person... and the soul mate is there... but some guys don't try and look... and so the whole thought of the "soul mate" is flawed... i know plenty of old people that aren't married and probably never will so really... i think there is not just one... i think there are many compatible... there's just a different future for each if you even get that far... but if we are getting to a religious discussion then all the apples are just in a perfect line on the ground leading to one last one or nothing... cuz you can't have an orchard with predestination
JEN: trust me i wasnt trying to get in a religous discussion
Me: okay
JEN: i just thought it was kinda funny'
JEN: the whole things
JEN: but nevermind haha
Me: why do you think that there would be only one apple in each tree?(it's okay... i just felt like combatting that one... everyone finds some beautifully simple analogy likes that to make themself feel better about being single or breaking up with their boyfriend... i think it's just silly)
JEN: i meant in your version....because you said there was one perfect tree with your soulmate so i assumed that one tree just had the one apple soulmate
JEN: and if every apple has a soulmate there would only be one apple on each tree
Me: there would be only one apple for each perfect tree
Me: the orchard is different per person
Me: and with girls there's not an orchard... if that's what you are getting at... guys get the orchard... girls get the grocery section of the store
Me: i meant produce section... sorry
JEN: dang
Me: i guess you could have a small grocery section... maybe canned apples or something... but with girls i think it shouldn't be limited to just apples... all fruits and vegetables... and some canned ones... and you can discern that however you'd like... but that's how i see it
JEN: you're saying we have more choice?
Me: hahhaha... if you say that you don't i'm going to end the conversation right now so i don't get mad
Me: well not mad... just annoyed with this feeling that girls have limited choices when it comes to guys... it's completely false and is just a self-esteem issue
JEN: umm... i'm not saying that we have limited choice but how is it that you think guys do?
JEN: sorry if that's stupid of me
JEN: you can end the conversation if you want
Me: ummm it's not stupid... i just have this thought on the whole dating thing as choice and limitations... only certain kinds of girls like certain kinds of guys but if they ever changed their minds they could get another kind anytime they wanted... guys are in a sense limited by the "season" or if you will... the girl's choice allowing themselves to be "picked" by the guys so naturally from that we see that girls have the wider choice and guys have a (we are talking generalities here) "limited" choice
JEN: i dont know if i agree with all that but i know what you are satying
Me: hahha... the great thing with theories is that half of them are unfounded... so who knows how it could work... i am more speaking from bias than objective truth...

Any other thoughts?

2005-02-28 07:06:47 ET

i wish i had a chainsaw because right now i want to fuck up my is a nice thought though. but you can spend years and years eating the apple from the soulmate tree and then it just goes old and rots and what you thought was the right apple was actually unripe and wanted to grow more.

2005-02-28 07:10:23 ET

my mother is fatally allergic to apples.

2005-02-28 12:09:52 ET


Cellar: Trust me on this, there are such things in the world as soul mates. And as far as the analogy goes, you could easily put males or females in the role of "apple." It's true that the genders are very different, it's true that of the two, women generally have the upper hand, but that entirely depends upon what sort of relationship you're using as your model. If you're looking at more superficial relationships that are about building up the egos and senses of self-worth of the individuals involed, relationships that are primarily concerned with sesory input and what can be gained or attained through the pairing, then yes, a lot of bad, ignorant, and generally immoral crap goes on.

Very often though, in REAL life with people who have managed to progress past the teenage years as far as emotional age is concerned, it is just as hard on women as it is on men - often times much more so.

2005-02-28 12:24:46 ET

lovelusthateyou - hahahaha... you meant you'd be taking a chainsaw to the produce section of your nearest grocery store... which would be cool too. i used to work in a grocery store for 2 and a half years right after i turned 15 and i would have liked to have seen some chick take a chainsaw to it.

sonik - that's too bad.

neko - oh i wasn't argueing that point... i think there's a soulmate(s) for everyone... but i think we have a choice of how to find them and some stop looking for the right one and just concentrate on the wrong ones. my arguement is that in the beginning of the relationship the majority of girls have the majority of choices whereas the majority of boys have the minority. i think analogies or categorizing or even trying to identify a pattern is wrong i just hate those cutesy analogies about how the good girls are the ones that are alone cuz there are no good boys except for the one that becomes their bitch. i think that's straight up bullshit.

2005-02-28 12:36:11 ET

Well would you feel the same way if they boys were the apples and the girls were the ones who were picking them?

2005-02-28 13:50:01 ET

yeh the grocery store never has what i need anymore, maybe i need to start looking in the apple orchard.

2005-03-02 04:30:37 ET

we do a pick your own apples thing every year. and you never EVER take apples off the ground. you always go for the trees and you usually have to climb high since people are lazy and overpick the bottom branches.

2005-03-06 10:24:50 ET

i think i'm a little lazy when it comes to picking apples... they look decent on the outside but they usually have a worm or a rotten core inside.

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