Last night, today, forever
2002-11-11 12:43:10 ET

These punk girls who live next door to me are always causing trouble. That's okay, as long as they don't fuck with my cat.

So, I went with my best friends Erika and Josh, as well as Wendy and another Josh, to see Eyedea & Abilities, Grouch, and J-Live down in LA last night. Had tickets in hand ready to go, trying to look flashy and what-not, and the fucking skinhead bodyguard wouldn't let Wendy in 'cause she looked faded. Wendy always looks faded, in a really cool way. And it is true that we had been smoking chronic and what-not, but fuck, we had pockets full of idiot money to spend at the bar, so I didn't understand. Too bad 'cause Eyedea's really good. We met some cool people in the parking lot who also got denied for dumb reasons such as no ID (flyer said all-ages), or the same "one person from your little crew of 7 lookes too faded. The other six of you can go in, but the one can't."

I met a cool guy who does silkscreen prints and mural pieces and what-not. Once again another lovable individual from Northern California. He said he's in OC a lot doing shows, so I'm gonna check him out. Nice conversation revolving around art, but in the perfect sort of way so as not to turn into a shmoozy name-game thing. That's why I love hip-hop shows; you always meet really cool, calm people with open ideas.

OH YO...found an apt! It's right down the street. It's gonna work out nicely, I can tell. The landlord seemed really cool. It's a complex, but it's big. And it's only $810, with $710 being our first month 'cause she's giving a discount 'cause we so damn nice! She even fucking offered to buy us some vegetarian pizza if we move some furniture! I'm saying hell yeah and WTF and doing a little grunty "Huh" with my face all scrunched up.

Don't forget that today comemorates the fact people died for the sake of arguements. Also, families who live in over-crowded refugee camps under tents with little food and much hassle pose the biggest threat to world peace.

If you have read this far, thanks! Have a splendid day!


2002-11-11 12:49:27 ET

thanks, I will have a splendid day.

2002-11-11 16:12:59 ET

where in N. California is he from?

I like cats. If those girls mess with your cat, I'll mess them up for you.

2002-11-11 16:15:31 ET

P.S. Do you read Whitman? Or have you atleast read "song of myself"?

2002-11-13 14:03:08 ET

I've never read Whitman before, but I checked him out and I really like it. The writing feels really thematic and extensive, while maintaining a focus. I think a feeling of concentration comes through by his poetic timing and wording. I like this:

"Clear and sweet is my Soul, and clear and sweet is
all that is not my Soul."

or this longer one:

"Trippers and askers surround me;
People I meet the effect upon me of my early life, or
the ward and city I live in, or the nation,
The latest dates, discoveries, inventions, societies,
authors old and new,
My dinner, dress, associates, looks, compliments, dues,
The real or fancied indifference of some man or woman
I love,
The sickness of one of my folks, or of myself, or ill-
doing, or loss or lack of money, or depressions
or exaltations;
Battles, the horrors of fratricidal war, the fever of
doubtful news, the fitful events;
These come to me days and nights, and go from me
again,
But they are not the Me myself."


It feels like the type of thing I was reading yesterday on Marx and Engels. I know that sounds kinda typical, but now I'm getting a clearer view on where they were coming from, primarily with the idea that the product of the day defines the culture of the day. I think 'product' in this sense means material innovation and discoveries provide the life we live, while we hold strong to the idea of individuality, for better or for worse.

Oh, that guy was from Sacramento...I think. He was really nice. Nice people are an enourmous inspiration.

2002-11-14 19:00:17 ET

i like his free verse.

well i was asking because i was supposed to write something similar to "song of myself" but im having trouble coming up with themes or symbolism. i can't write on command and when I am I freeze up and everything sounds forced...and i dont know.. just so fake.

my favorite part is the line "Smile, as your lover comes."

Apparently Whitman was gay and when I read that I was thinking, "is my mind being dirty.....is he really saying what i think he means?"

how "individual" are we in the end?

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