| im staring at the asphault wondering, whats barely underneath 2005-05-21 19:42:16 ET |
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im getting that all to familiar feeling of haveing nothing to live for and wanting to die, but not ever wanting to actually do it because it would discomfort other people. not that i ever would, i just feel fucking horrible, and it wont go away for a while. I am going to quit my job, but i cant do that till i find a new one. i hate my new boss, and just wish it was like the old days, which it will never be. my only alternative is to find a new job somewhere else. too bad i am being to picky to actually find something. i would enjoy working at independent records, but so would every other teenager in this town, so good luck with that one. i wouldnt mind working at hot topic, but there are no openings, and i would be selling my punkrockness to the man, like i would really mind being a whore. i just want to work somewhere in which i can completely be myself, and not worry about pissing off my boss. i literally cower in fear of my boss, which is a bit ironic, seeing as over him and could break him with my bare hands. oh and by the way, the one person i can talk to isnt speaking to me. she has fairly good reason (I think) but still it makes things harder. so while i already miss her more than anything cuz i am always at work, or when i am not, i am far too tired to spend time with her. fuck this job, fuck this school, fuck this world, fuck this life. but at least im breathing. HA
Sound: Postal Service- The District Sleeps Alone Tonight
EDIT: Also i miss my daddy so much it hurts
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