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2004-01-12 22:41:34 ET Oh, fuck, I don’t know if I’m becoming more antisocial or what… why I do need to go out more often, or ...uh, try to go out with schoolmates when they invite me... whatever... then only place I go our is to the music school, I spend time there from 4 pm to 9 pm (4 to 7, either giving violin lessons or studying violin method by myself; and from 7 to 9 rehearsal with the orchestra), then just go home, then sometimes use to computer or watch tv, wake up really late, again use the computer or watch tv then eat, then again go to the music school... and that’s what I’ve been doing lately... thus, one word: pathetic! Well do I even really deserve to “hang out” with people? I always get bored, I feel like I was not my age, many of what they do I’m always like “oh, how childish... bleh”, and sometimes enjoying more what older people, do like laughing more at some old man’s jokes... huh... yeah, right, like if I were really a mature person..., no one has told that I’m a responsible mature person or something, so sometimes I feel like I’m 70 years old, sometimes like a berserker beast full of wrath... hence I can’t have an appropriate conduct of any kind of society, either youngsters or old people. Well, about the violin I’ve been practicing to play some hard pieces called Danzón No. 2 and Huapango, because we’re going to play on a very big event thing on February like the last year. Oh and I forgot about the drawing, I’ve been tired lately and not feeling like sitting to draw something. Fuck, I need another life. |
