Bitter tears.
2004-03-12 22:37:11 ET

Iíve been slacking a lot in school, if either I donít understand much of some classes I think itís time to read something of any of the books; but damn me, Iím always so distracted by anything else, mainly music.

Everyday I feel more outside of anything, wherever I try to look into I found something that disgusts me, like a bitter old man about to die, always hating some people and other things, but I donít often show it. Fuck, I hate this new emo-punkish stuff, I see kids like that everywhere I look, now thatís the new mainstream, and I hate it. Hear me, I sound like a bitter old man, shit.

How sick can someone be without being extroverted? I wish I knew more introverted people, Iím sick of always dealing with fucking joyful people, they always tell me to ďbe happyĒ just like that, without any reason. Well, for all of you that (trying to cheer up someone) have ever tell to anyone ďto be happyĒ, think before talking..., happiness is not a mood, itís a reward.

2004-03-13 00:57:33 ET

Im not sure why you dont like the extroverts.
Im extremely extroverted..however, Im not the most 'joyful' person on earth.
I suppose it's a matter of opinion, though.

2004-03-31 05:28:43 ET

"Like a fine whine, I get bitter with age." - Me

How old are you anyway? Early 20s or something? I'm sure you can't be MY age cuz I'm older than dirt (almost 40). It makes me kinda sad when I see people much younger than me feeling so bitter. I wish I could tell you it will get better but it doesn't. It gets worse. LOL. Well, your attitude will anyway. Ha ha. I swear, I'm more rebellious and bitter now than I was at 17.

Just channel your negativity into creative endeavors like your art and you'll do fine. :)

2004-03-31 20:50:54 ET

Mmh... yes, wisdom from fine wines.
In deed, I try to channel all this stuff with art... I gues... it's the only thing that have kept me alive these past months.
A friend also is often telling me that it's bad for me being so apathetic and too bitter at 19.

  Return to Malkavian's page