2004-09-25 21:43:20 ET

Iím back; now the reason for not being lately here, wasnít because I was busy or something, but because the my internet provider had troubles and they had to shout it down for almost a week. Now itís back but still with some troubles the speed is very low, damn them.
Iím not sure was it that I wanted to write here time ago, I always forget things. Well other that the constant depressions, Iím not sure what is there to rant about.
Oh, I remembered. The director told us about a month ago that weíre going to play a solo, we chose the piece, but it has to be played by memory, and I have such a bad memory, but after almost 4 weeks, I finally learned my solo of memory, now my major problem, is my fear of playing it solo, even though there isnít going to be much audience, I get nervous by just knowing that people is hearing me playing solo. When my playing with the orchestra I donít mind, but when it comes to a solo, I get really nervous. Iíve always been a really shy guy (clearly demonstrated here in with all my journal entries), so knowing my bad luck Iíll probably get too nervous and play bad. Yet, Iím not playing it completely alone, that is, Iím accompanied by the piano, but the main melody Iíll do it in violin. Iíll be playing the 7th movement of Bachís Suite in B minor, the Badinerie, itís originally for flute, but Iíll play it in violin. The day will be this Thursday Sept. 30. Wish me luck to not make an ass of myself.

2004-09-26 09:49:23 ET

Right on! that's one of my favorite melodies!

Good luck!

I totally know what you mean stage fright wise. I get that too with my singing. In a chorus, I'm fine, solo, man. that's hard.

2004-09-26 10:07:00 ET

Good luck with that, dear.

2004-09-26 10:30:41 ET

Oh cool, I wish I could make it!

2004-10-02 21:26:29 ET

Maybe the only good way to do it would be if I played alone in a room with no one in ther but me and playing it as best as I could, and then that the room had like some glass where everybody saw me and they liked it but I never knew they were watching me.
It's just that... I'm not used to feel like someone is paying attention to me.

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