2002-08-14 13:54:42 ET|
A while ago I tried to pain again. Painting the sketch I left here when I went to Dallas, and while trying to paint I realized how hard is it.
The painting I did in Dallas was not like this here. I mean, there I was using acrylic paints and they dry very fast, even though they smell a bit nice, I reThmember I barely could slide the brush a few times because the paint dried too fast that I couldnít make fade effects so well, thatís one reason why I didnít like how it turned up at the end. Another thing was that the fucking paints change a little their colors when they dried, the kind of the darker, to another problem was that when I mixed several tones to get the color I wanted and I ran out of it, while I was preparing the other mixture, the fucking paint already placed in the wall got darker, so the new mixture (that should be the same color) I wasnít sure if it was the same tone or not, I had to guess what tone will it get when I was going to paint it in the wall, so this is why in there turned up with some different tones of one same color, for example, the gray, in some places it got darker and in some other it got lighter. I donít know if that same problem Iíll have at home or not, but now the problem here is that with oil paints it takes them to dry too long, so when I was ready to put the lighter tone of one color it started to mix in the previous placed and the Ďlight toneí started to vanish, so Iíll have to wait until the other one gets a bit more dried. The good thing about this is that it is easier to blur it and fade the colors, which I like. But hey, in case you havenít noticed, I am an AMATEUR, yes, with this painting at home it will be my third painting in my whole life and all by my own will, so feel totally free calling me rookie. So I must say that the Ďthingí I did in Dallas is horrible, really ugly shit; the main idea of the picture wasnít so bad, what it sucks is my work there, is totally a piece of shit, it seems like if a kid had done it, itís a mess.
And talking about rookies, as I mentioned previously, I bought finally a violin with the money I gained in Dallas, but, since I donít have other instrument in which I can take a sound as an example to tune the violin correctly, I canít practice for now, so Iíll wait to Saturday to come so Iíll get someone to tune it for me at the Art Institute so I can learn to do it by myself, I was barely able to place the bridge and the strings correctly (I think). The important for now is that I finally have this baby with me and I like it very much, so Iíll keep try doing my best in learning how to play in spite of my lameness to do anything.
The writing of the previous paragraphs puts me to think again if I chose the right career and why. I never feel confident about a decision. It seems Iíll always be the ďwhateverĒ guy.