2007-09-01 22:09:59 ET

Tonight was the first time in over six months that I worked a Saturday evening. Perhaps to welcome me back, somebody shit on the men's room floor. Seriously, guys, why not just cut off those opposable thumbs and be done with it? Then I had to babysit some kids in the music section to make sure they didn't steal anything.

Still, at least I didn't have to get up at five in the morning. This is very important.

2007-09-02 03:24:55 ET

well at least they didnt shit on the coats?

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