blah blah
2006-06-18 19:06:56 ET

a little explaining:
I just got back from Andrews, SC alittle bit ago, i had to work at blockbuster this evening. I was at my friends house for a couple of days.

Wierd facts and news, i suppose:
So Kristen's, husbands uncle, Jason, says to me "I want you to be in my band"
we talk about it..then he says" Oh yea, we go on tour in 3 months"
Catch is this:
I havent picked up a bass in a year.
I would have to re-learn EVERYTHING.
I dont have a bass anymore, i sold it cause i needed money.
I get stage fright.. and by that i mean even playing in front of 5 people i get wierd.

He has already offered to teach me everything again, has a bass for me to play .....
I will pick everything up again fast though, so its no worry.

It all sounds great, yea.
But I just started a new job.
I'm gaurenteed the amount of cash i need for bills each month with touring, thats what he said. So things would be covered here at the house.
Thing is...
what happens after touring?
I mean, I really dont think my job is going to hold the postion open for me when I come back from the "tour".
I mean, this would be a dream come true for me.
And though I didnt agree to anything yet, he ask me when I want to start practicing.
I would love to do this...and something is telling me too. But, just that "what happens after the tour?"..bothers me a bit. I'm sure it wont be too hard for me to find another job when I'd get back, but still.

on other news...
I think I'm going to just quit at blockbuster, cause its just going to be too much bullshit for little amount of hours and money.. and I'm already covered with bills and then some at my new job.
So I'm deciding that.

Random thought:
Why cant I take these guys i'm talking to and combind them into one?
All together they would make my dream guy.

once again.. in life.. I have found myself in with musician. I really think thats my "type" of guy. And the type I'm suppose to be with. cause I always find myself dating or attracted to one.. even before I find out that they are a musician.

life.......its strange.

2006-06-18 19:24:19 ET

think you should go for the tour... it's not everyday you get an offer like that...
sounds like it would be a blast... and may even open a few more doors...
so not a bad vibe...
and life tends to be a bit of a drauma queen...
but sometimes if you smack that bitch just right... she'll get in line for ya...
life's a ho... smark 'r up (stupidest thing that's ever come from my mouth/well close anyhow)
hope you doin' alright?

2006-06-18 20:04:08 ET

I'm thinking about it. I mean that is a big decision to make considering I split my mom on bills and whatnot.. and that i just got a new job.
I really would like to do it, but to relearn bass , new songs.. get comfortable with the band and to get use to playing in front of people in 3 months is going to be quite a challenge.

2006-06-18 20:17:06 ET

yea tis true... but really get comfortable with the songs... and overlook the people... and it'll be alright... i've gotten stage fright a lot of my life... but if you don't feel like it's all about you... then it won't be near as bad...
it's tough to look outside the body... but it does make it easier... to kind of take it as is... just a show...
and don't think about messing up either... just play...

people take shows and make them into a really theatrical idea... but to the majority of people... it's just a show... and half the time they aren't really paying that much attention anyhow... just remember that they aren't there for you... you just are there also... and no one see's you over anyone else... wether they do or not... doesn't really matter... cause most of these people you will not see again...
(still get a lil' stage fright... but not near as bad as i used 2... for the mere fact... what does others opinion really matter?... why would their approval for your life be anything?... it's your life... not theirs... and their life is theirs... and not yours... so most people will overlook small mess ups... or most things... for they aren't thinking of you like you're something more then human... you merely are just doin' what most of them wished they could)

2006-06-18 20:28:34 ET

True true.

so you really think I should go for this?

my friend back home in md thinks so, mainly for the fact that it is a rare offer.
And I did make that vow to myself a while bakc ...always take the oppurtunities I feel strong about.. i never want to look back at life and say "what if"..

2006-06-18 21:21:30 ET

it does sound like a good idea... life is never truely just 'easy'... no matter what you do... so there is no real reason not 2...
a job now days really means about as much as a hill of beans... most of 'em aren't worth having in the first place... so i'd go for something i think i could get into... if the offer arose for myself

2006-06-18 22:34:05 ET

this is going to be quite the challenge...


i just wonder if these fellas can handle me.. lol

2006-06-19 10:12:41 ET

well they did ask for ya... so apparently it's there problem now haha... \m/ i wouldn't worry too much about it

2006-06-19 14:31:57 ET

yes, true true

thank you!

2006-06-19 16:03:33 ET

tis welcome... best of blessings with the whole thing \m/

2006-06-20 13:30:01 ET

thank you. same to you in life.

2006-06-21 08:01:20 ET

thank ya

2006-06-21 08:32:05 ET

your welcome

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