yea, drama filled weekend...
2002-09-29 07:41:44 ET

brought to you by the the letters Fucking Loser .....

Yeah, so I'm back from Hyndman, got back this morning around 10:30/11am. Krystal brought me home, I think shes alittle mad at me. I will explain in a moment......

Friday Krystals and AJ got me around 4:30,We went to BK tto eat,went to the mall,drop off our applecations for Walden Books,we came to my house so I could get my medicine,we went to get cigarettes,back to Hyndman,Krystal dropped me an AJ off at his house,Him and I walked around, talked and smoked a cigarette or 2,went back to his house,went to his room in the garage, Hung out, talked,watch a Robin Williams comedy thing,we made out a bit,that went to ____ ___ (fill in blanks),we sat and finished watching it, AJ fell asleep on me,I accidently woke him up when I went to sit down after turning off the tv,we went outside an smoke a cig,then we went to bed.

Saturday I woke him up at 10, we ate breakfast. sat in his room and talked, tried to call krystal,she wasen't home, so we walked around and smoked a cig,went back to his house and talked some more, made out, _____ (fill in blank), went for Krystal agian, found her,she was going to be awhile, Went to Tonys with AJ,Watched them skateboard while I smoked a cigarette and tried to get all the knotts out of my hair,Krystal came alittle while later,Her and I went to Bedford to see her mom at work,Got back around 8,Went to brians, AJ was there,I got horrible pains, so AJ and I walked to his house so I could talk and relax a bit,Krystal came,dropped of my shit ( I was suppose to stay at her house),she left. AJ tried to make me make a decision on where I was staying that night, couldn't chose ,wanted to do both, started flipping out, he made a decision for me, took about 2-2 1/2 hours to calm me, when calm talk, joked around to get me in better mood, went in his room, talked somemore,relaxed, listened to some music, made out, _____ (fill in blank with 3 letter word) __ (fill in blank with #), then talked, smoked,talked , smoked, relaxed, smoked, went in house, went to bed.

Today,aj woke me up at 9/9:30, ate breakfast, Krystal came at 10 to pick me up, we talked, she said shes not mad, I see differently, brought me home, watched Queen of the Damned, started on x-mas list mom wants, now I'm here.

drama again this weekend, will it ever seise?...
right now I'm feeling tired, and lost. these pains I'm having, are the pains I had when I got the laporscopy, same place, same pain but only worse. I don't want to tell mom, cause then I'll have to go to the doctor, and I don't want to go. I really don't. I don't know what to do, AJ understands why I don't want to go, but Krystal says I should go, and I just don't know. I can deal with this pain, I think. I'm just not willing to go to the doctors...

2002-09-29 08:01:08 ET

whats the good reason why you dont wanna go to the doctors?

2002-09-29 08:56:41 ET

if you dont go to the doctor now, you'll be in more pain later, and will have to see more doctors.

2002-09-29 09:23:04 ET

Cyndi- the reason is, everytime I go to the doctors I find out something is seriously wrong with me and they either poke probe and test me and put me on a bunch of meds or they poke,probe,test me,and then I end up getting cut open, I don't like it, and I don't want to go through any of that again..never ever agian...

Twilightskin- yeah, I know...but I don't want to go through all of what I said to cyndi above, agian...I'm already an emotional wreak anymore, and when I have a surgery or something I get freaked out, so I'm basically flip my lid if I had to go through that in the emotional state I'm in...

2002-09-29 18:48:53 ET

awwww thats sucky =(

2002-09-30 06:26:25 ET now I don't know what to do....blah..I hope the pain gets so bad it kills me..

2002-09-30 19:11:52 ET

awww nooo!! cuz im suppose to come VISIT YOU!!

2002-10-03 16:27:35 ET


2002-10-03 20:02:37 ET

cheer up buttercup!

2002-10-06 18:01:07 ET


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