"Jesus" this is scary. And I don't think it's satire; it seems to be hosted with a "christian web hosting solutions" company. It's all so out there, though, yikes. Reminds me of a Simpsons episode..
The christian kids got it all together though; I had one such friend in high school who was getting more pussy than he could handle. He wasn't attractive, but something about that wooden cross drove the girls crazy..