"Why can't I own Canadians?" - Wyoming Part 2
2003-10-29 03:48:05 ET

Before reading this, go read Antoire's entry "Wyoming"

Why Can't I Own Canadians?

Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned in any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair
price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in
her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 5:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
abomination (Lev. 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I
have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by
Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two
different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev. 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14).

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan, Jake

2003-10-29 05:04:25 ET

i dislike strongly people who feel that they can educate others about god -

i believe god is different to every individual - how you see him/her/it is completely up to that person.

2003-10-29 07:04:07 ET

I think there is something to be said for pasing on the core principles of humanity; be nice to others, don't steal, cheat or lie, be good to yourself, help others in need. But as soon as you start quoting texts that are 2, 3 or 4 thousand years old and have been interpreted and translated hundreds of times over, then your in trouble. Talk about broken telephone times 4 thousand years.

2003-10-29 07:05:03 ET

humanity and god are so different though

2003-10-29 07:08:35 ET

Yeah. I don't think it cares about us too much anymore. We have to care for each other now.

2003-10-29 10:12:45 ET

it's a hard job .

2003-10-29 10:20:13 ET

To care for each other? I don't think it has to be. An arm outstretched in friendship, a shoulder available for tears, an ear to hear opinions, hands ready for massaging away the knots of stressful days... these are small things to give, but big things to receive. And I don't think it ever takes much to care about another person.
If each person in the world chose one other person to care about, think of the progress that would be made. Such a simple way to ease all the upset in the world.

2003-10-29 10:55:07 ET

*agrees with Cheshire*

It doesn't take a whole lot to be kind and caring to other people.. and I think if most people actually tried to live in a positive, giving way rather than pedantically clinging to ancient texts and hating anyone who thinks differently, the world would be a much better place.

2003-10-29 10:56:04 ET

then why do i always feel alone.

2003-10-29 10:56:48 ET

i think that that's one of the most emo comments i've ever said - but that FUCKING FAKE shit that people do.

they dont really care. they dont.
it's those very few... who do. who know how.
very very few.

2003-10-29 10:59:39 ET

nothing wrong with the occasional EMO comment.. as long as you don't go and sit in a corner, listening to the Juliana Theory and weeping now. :P

I just wish people were actually decent to each other. It doesn't take much, ye know?

2003-10-29 11:07:11 ET

it doesnt. i completely agree. but i'd be a hypocrite if i demanded niceness from people. you know?

i try to be nicer to people though. daily talks with myself...
part of my spirituality...

2003-10-29 11:11:00 ET

Yeah, that's totally understandable.

Very cool. Every little bit helps, and spirituality tends to be good for that.

2003-10-29 11:25:03 ET

it's so true -

as much as i hate organized religion - confiding in "my god" - there's no other term to get across what i view as my supreme being - i believe everyone views god differently and embodies many love objects or anything...

confiding has helped me get through a lot. i dont necessarily believe in a greater concious being - but nature and the world in itself is good enough for me...

2003-10-29 11:27:12 ET

Each of us is going to have our own idea of deity and its involvement in our lives.. but having a means of expressions/communication with whatever our perception of it is, can be an amazing thing. One doesn't have to follow specific theological tenets and dogma in order to be spiritual, neh?


2003-10-29 11:27:28 ET

amen sybarite.

2003-10-29 13:47:41 ET

wow...quite the can o' worms I opened up. Nice to spark conversation for a bit tho.

2003-10-29 14:20:41 ET

*giggles a bit* entertaining

2003-10-29 15:49:56 ET

wow. I love you guys. :)

2003-10-29 16:25:00 ET

we're speshul.

2003-10-29 19:13:20 ET

with a "c" even. ;D

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