2002-10-31 12:19:42 ET|
I hate today.
I don't even know where to begin. I would live a much healthier life if today didn't exist. Ugh. So like my sisters came stampeding in with food enough to feed a small battalion. See, our parents have an anerversary party shindig thing tomorrow (for which I am unprepared for, mentally. Fuck. 30 guests. *tightens noose*), instead of spending less money and buying prepared food, nooo they gotta cook. And me male schovinist pig has to cook, too, even though I donno how, and have better things to do. I love being emotionally manipulated into doing meaniale jobs, and then being dissed for doing it "wrong" or whatever. It's fucking peeling potatoes! I can do it FINE. I didn't spend half a year in basic+advanced training for nothing. Fuck. And my whole family are maniacs. The air was so fucking tense. It's like everytime we're all together something has to go horribly wrong. Oh, and did I mention there was hidious Brazillian music in the background? And all the while I'm being nagged to do this, and do that, I swear, being the youngest isn't all it's cracked up to be. They fucking freak me out. I was fucking talking for 5 seconds on ICQ and my mother started yelling at me that she's not suppsoed to be cooking and to get my ass downstair or whatever. And all this time I was supposed to go pick up Liron, and head off to Noa and have a nice evening drinking coffee and watching TV, but nooooo, see my eldest sister had to have a friggin psychotic episode, that everything turned out bad, and bla bla bla, it's all worthless shit, bla bla bla, (of course we're talking about the eggplant dish I was frying for the last hour instead of getting ready and leaving the goddamn house), then she abruptly left the house, slammed the door. So I went out, drove her home to Tel-Aviv (I had NOT intended on doing that), all the while she's fucking crying and telling me I should leave that place as soon as I can. So, it's fucking true, but, also, fuck her! I don't need her fucking advice! I need to be left alone. I can't handle family events. I don't know what I'm going to do tomorrow. My other sister then called me, asking me if "I intended to leave her with her dick in her hand".. What the fucK??? Was I supposed to let our sister _walk_ home?? I fucking NEED to leave the house at least ONCE A DAY. I can't rot in my room all day long, and then jump up to her every whim. As a bonus, I got all sorts of tasks for tomorrow's event, I gotta buy stuff n' shit. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do. All I wanna do is run out of here and smoke my pot in peace. And I think I kinda pissed Noa off 'cause I couldn't make it, and this is all too frustrating for me to handle. This shindig tomorrow is starting at 22:00, if I'm not dead or out of the house by 23:00, something too horrible to speak of might happen.
Oh, and as extra fun, it seems my site is down.
I wanna crush something in my fist and not open till it's dust.