2003-01-30 04:38:41 ET
I AM NOT: a matriculated grad student, pro writer, owner of working car.
I WAS: small at one point.
I WAS NEVER: sane or in a stable family situation.
I WILL BE: sucessful and fully independent of drunks who spawned me.
I WILL: get into the damned library science program.
I WILL NOT: Succumb to my urge to build a car/computer/Rutger Hauer as Roy Baty clone for the express purpose of world domination or tormenting my exes.
I LIKE: movies, reading, writing, snotty cartoons, webcomics, surveys.
I LOVE: My bf, my friends...other than that, not very passionate about much.
I DISLIKE: those damned earthlings and this cockamamie rule that I have to apply for citezenship lest i get deported to Mars...grr...
I HATE: waking up with a headache and a stiff neck at 6 in the morning.
I WANT: normal mood swings.
I NEED: To stop letting comments from exes and mother regarding my weight get to me. To recognize that I am not perfect.
I DONT WANT: to burn out mentally.
I DONT NEED: bad body image, insecurities, anxiety, that nasty floor lamp in my room.
I SHOULDN'T: eat on the go, just go along with others, procrastinate.
I'D LIKE TO HAVE: more assertiveness.
I'D LIKE TO OWN: A house, a car that starts on the first go.
I LISTEN: to everything save rap, country and most top 40.
I EAT: on the go and not too often. I have to sop doing that.
I DRINK: an obscene amount of coffee.
I SMOKE: cloves out the window.
I DRESS: whatever is black, comfy and appropriate for work.
I LAUGH: pretty easily
I DRIVE: hopefully a Saturn L200...failing that, it is back to the chevy poop mobile that has acceleration issues.
I PLAY: Nintendo and JT's blocks at work.
I CRY: not often.
I YELL: I seethe, actually.
I DREAM: and feel disoriented when i wake.
I FEEL: exhaustion too damned intensely sometimes.
I MAKE: various pamphlet records, some foodstuffs, occasionally mixed drinks...which should be offered to Total Eclipse *hands over concoction of Ginger Ale, Pineapple juice and vodka*.
I SAY: bah!
I WISH I COULD: change.
I WISH I WAS: someone with a normal family.
I WISH I WASN'T: depressed, cynical, a pocket oscar levant (he made a comedy routine based on his various mental ilnesses).
I AM HAPPY: when with friends.
I AM HORNY: I read LOTR slash porn at my second job. nuff said.
I LOVE MYSELF: too conditionally
I WANT TO ______RIGHT NOW: sleep.
I WANT TO ______ TOMORROW: buy a new car.