am i not just the coolest?
2004-05-19 00:16:36 ET

i didnt the smartest thing.

to deal with my lost love. i fukken drank a six pack, and now i am fukking sitting here listening to emo and crying.

i didnt think i would take his absence this hard. but i shud have known better than to get drunk in the mindframe of saddness.

now i feel self destructive and angry and sad. and lonely.

listen to this sob story, by no means am i being sob sob, for attention.

but seriously.

have any of you ever hated yourself soo much that u wish u had the guts to do something about it.

but then you think about your parents and all that they have tried to do to save you, and the love they feel for you. that stopped you.

is there some small form of hope for me yet?

who thinks i have a problem?

2004-05-19 00:39:37 ET


I've been through many breakups and it never gets easier, but you do at least start to know what to expect from yourself emotionally and realize that slowly you WILL feel better, but it doesn't happen overnight.

2004-05-19 06:09:05 ET

There is always hope and no, you don't have a problem.

*hugs n cuddles*

2004-05-19 12:28:26 ET

thanx guys.

i am completely beside myself.

but i am goin on a rod trip to a music festival this weekend.

and hopefully it shud be fun.

2004-05-19 12:47:05 ET

what festival? and where?

2004-05-19 12:53:00 ET

music festival..

small town south of whitehorse. the town is called watson lake.

umm swollen mebers are coming, along withmany small hip hop groups, umm some local heavy metal bands. and some indie rock/emo bands.

2004-05-19 12:54:08 ET

swollen members are so much fun live, that sounds like it'll be awesome!

have a good time chicka. you sound like you need it. :)

2004-05-19 13:02:16 ET

yeh i kno i met them in victoria, and partied with them.

i provided them with party favors too.

they already sent me an email. i think they might be bringing nelly furtado too. for breathe.

i already have backstage passes. woo hooo.

and yes i really really do need to have a good time, nmy best friend is coming up too for the weekend.

2004-05-19 14:42:02 ET

wow, that's pretty darn spiffy!

2004-05-19 22:56:08 ET

it is.

i just need to find a ride. my dad wont let me take my computer.


i mean my car. whoa.

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