2003-04-11 12:22:40 ET

Today for the first time in life I felt Hate, True Hate, Pure Hate. My body surges with it and for the first time in my life I wish I was ignorant. I wish I lived in a world where people don't experience real Hate. I am not talking hate like when your boy friend cheats on you and you hate him. I am talking the Hate you Hate when someone has hurt you so bad that it wont ever leave and there is no justice. I now know the force that drives murderers. Because today for the first time in my life I really thought about killing someone not even killing them worse than that. I wanted to cause a pain so great it would never leave and then grant them immortality just so they have to feel this pain for ever.
For the love of my husband and family I don't act on these urges, but they are there. Today I lost somethingI guess it could be called innocence but it seems so much more important. I changed today and I don't like it, you can see it in my eyes. I now know what pain can do to a person and I am now know what makes horrible monsters who they are.

2003-04-11 12:39:34 ET

Who or what has inspired such hatred in you?

2003-04-11 12:44:50 ET


This is the simple story it is a lil more complex but it explains it to a point

2003-04-11 15:16:33 ET

I have responded, Apes. PM me and we'll talk. *HUGS*

2003-04-11 17:01:29 ET

*hugs aprilmay*

2003-04-12 08:21:35 ET

Get vengeance, the legal way. Prick. ***HUGS April May**

  Return to april may's page