saturday night fever

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 06:58:30 ET i had a sudden insight in the shower this morning. my fear of relationships manifests in bizaare ways. for example: i met an attractive young lady from the detroit area at batcave on saturday and within 2 minutes of being introduced to her, i had her phone number. rewind my life 8 months. i met a similar young lady from ohio and the same thing happened. i examined my club life in the time in between. i must have met dozens of young attractive ladies from the ny/nj area. how many numbers? zero. how can i only be interested in women that i have no chance at a stable relationship with? this is destructive behaviour! i need to get a grip and stop being a chickenshit. thanks to everyone who had nice comments about my new gallery. hearts to all of you!

goulachick 2002-12-09 07:15:01 ET sorry so late but yea ur pic's are awsome!

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 07:16:22 ET thank you!!!

goulachick 2002-12-09 07:17:02 ET welcome sweetie

AngryLove 2002-12-09 07:41:31 ET (also quite late) what are you talking about?! you are very photogenic! and...everyone goes through a time when they are attracted to people they know they can't have a stable relationship with...so why not have a little fun in the process?

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 07:52:50 ET angry: thanks! and my avoidance of girls is running on 2 years now...and the one time i let my guard down, the girl turned out to be fairly unstable. and im not what you'd call a 'player' im much too shy to have casual sex...id rather be alone than do that. but i do enjoy meeting new people and hanging out.

AngryLove 2002-12-09 07:54:51 ET well, whatever works for you. I could only have casual sex if I was in that sort of mood. but I get what your saying. its cool...

goulachick 2002-12-09 07:58:51 ET i always somehow end up with the assholes...do i have a big blinking light above me saying assholes come to me???

AngryLove 2002-12-09 07:59:28 ET goulachick: I know EXACTLY how you feel!

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:00:46 ET hehe glad someone does

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 08:02:00 ET trust me, i wish i werent as shy as i am! ive missed out on so much action!!! blarg but i also do not look down on people who do engage in casual sex. i believe that it is a form of self expression...and it is not a bad thing in and of itself. and maybe one day i will participate...just to try it. i like to experience new things.

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:02:26 ET yeah same here. ;) its funny how that works out. and its even worse when you meet a guy that is nice at first then he turns into a jerk. so then you think you were the one to turn him that way.

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:03:05 ET experiencing new things is fun

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:04:51 ET i tried the whole casual thing one night...i did not like it...its just not for me...i get attatched...

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 08:05:26 ET angry: its sad that guys will act nice to get laid then not care anymore. that is the single most annoying thing about guys. and i am a guy myself! i cant even imagine how girls deal with that.

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:06:18 ET heh...yeah...I used to get attatched to people a lot. but...I'm getting over it. to me sometimes...you just need to get laid. but that's just me...

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:08:26 ET azrael: I had that happen to me. in fact the guy that took my viriginity did that. he was a good friend of mine too. we liked each other and everything(so I heard from his side) and then after it happened...he just stopped talking to me. and when he did talk...he'd get annoyed and pissed off at me very easily. it got to me at first...but now...I'm just like...fuck it.

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:10:15 ET secretly inside i am a hopeless romantic

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:11:42 ET me too, chick, me too

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:11:52 ET but its dying

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 08:18:39 ET me too! being a guy and also being a romantic is not a good combo. my guy friends rib me aall the time about not 'going for it' and the girls are like 'you are too sensitive' i wanna be your friend! arg!

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:21:14 ET fuck...I'd like to have a guy like you, azrael, but sometimes you just need to have a little fun. that's what I believe....a little self-indulgence never hurt anyone.

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:27:40 ET me too!!!...to bad you live so far away...i need a guy like you!

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:28:36 ET the perfect couples find each other in situations where they can't have each other.

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:29:16 ET damn straight

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:30:11 ET *sigh* it sucks...

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:32:59 ET yup yup..le sigh

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 08:34:03 ET oh, dont think i dont have fun! i do! i indulge myself plenty. and i do have random hook ups (drunken) at clubs...i never take it to the next level (i actually tried once but couldnt close the deal) i have plenty of fun without sex. but sex is fun too. and i'd be lying if i said that i didnt miss it. i just cant remain unemotional when doing...it really sucks. its supposed to be the one thing guys are good at!

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:37:38 ET eh not all guys are the same.

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:38:06 ET damn...an actual (sp) real good guy..damn..

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 08:42:04 ET well it didnt help the girl i brought home was as dumb as rocks...and rocks everywhere should be insulted at the comparison! i just layed there thinking...what the hell am i doing? i didnt feel right. didnt feel comfortable in my own head. and you know i have to be able to live with myself

AngryLove 2002-12-09 08:44:15 ET yeah...

goulachick 2002-12-09 08:44:38 ET awwwww....

doktor242 2002-12-09 08:47:35 ET you know, sometimes I think you're the smart one, Azrael. i keep meeting girls that seem wonderful, then blow up in my face, and make me feel like I'm the one who fucked up.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 09:06:27 ET the key is to assume that any particular girl is completely insane until she proves otherwise. sorry ladies...but thats been my personal experience

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:08:14 ET i know how you feel...i assume that of guys too

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:08:48 ET my ex just sent me an email and added me as a buddie on his yahoo...odd

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 09:10:00 ET he's making a bold move!

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:11:57 ET i dunno what to do...i love him with all my life but he ripps me apart on the inside

doktor242 2002-12-09 09:18:27 ET I say you throw luncheon meat at him. It's so crazy that it makes sense. <umm, yeah, I slept 3 hours last night.>

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:23:13 ET he is in south america...(navy)..6 month deployment

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 09:26:04 ET ouch!

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:30:01 ET he will be back in march

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 09:32:51 ET then you have something to look forward to!

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:36:59 ET no i am terrified...he left me at a horrible point in my live and it hurt me more that anything.....he only started trying to have anything to do with me after he burned his face up

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:37:14 ET i don't want him to hurt me like that again

goulachick 2002-12-09 09:38:29 ET he left me the day i went to the doctor and found out i had cancer..got in a wreck b/c i was crying so hard and sprained me wrist...ugh...it suxed bad

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 09:49:40 ET cancer! holy shit!!!! is it in remission? and what do you mean, he burned his face up?

doktor242 2002-12-09 09:57:30 ET I think it's official, Goulachick has the roughest life on SK. *cries* *give Goulachick a big hug*

goulachick 2002-12-09 10:01:32 ET no its much better now...it was cervical they have cut it out and i am in remission..wel..the goofy boy was tore up drunk and tried to down a shot of everclear while it was on fire..hehehe stupid stupid

goulachick 2002-12-09 10:01:45 ET TY for the love though

doktor242 2002-12-09 10:07:12 ET anytime!

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 10:07:52 ET goul: best wishes on your health! i'll have a drink in your honor tonight. hmm...everclear on fire, eh. and this is the guy you are in love with?!?! ;P

goulachick 2002-12-09 10:09:41 ET he was drunk off his ass...he was not in the right state of mind

goulachick 2002-12-09 10:10:13 ET i love him very much...but i don't want him to hurt me again so i don't think i'll take him back

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 10:10:37 ET lol..i was just teasing, i'm sure he is a fine fellow

goulachick 2002-12-09 10:12:42 ET well he used to be...something happened to him when he went home to frisco B4 he left...something changed him so much...i was told by his friends he was going to ask me to marry him when he got back...but he left me when he came back

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 10:14:22 ET cold feet. he blew it! it happens sometimes. feel of commitment...blah blah. its very common...dont take it personally

goulachick 2002-12-09 10:15:46 ET i dunno...i just don't know what to do..i love him but i can't take the pain again

DARKghostSHAE 2002-12-09 12:56:22 ET funny. i get numbers when im in when i live in tah, but visiting california and when i live in california and just visit utah i get numbers but not when i am where i live at the given moment. *_* get it? ya. weird.

Insomnia 2002-12-09 13:59:31 ET I did that all the time back in Cali, especially since a lot of people used to come there from out of town. Keep it up. The alternatives only hurt you.

pseudo kiss 2002-12-09 14:41:58 ET coughHOTcough.

STORM 2002-12-09 16:12:46 ET You're hotter then Rocc0 ::touches self:: ... and you have my number. OHHHYEAHHHHH

azraeltrigger 2002-12-09 23:24:03 ET shae: that must be frustrating...but it seems like you spend a good amount of time in both locales so score for you! insomnia: heh, i guess... pseudo: thanks sweetie ;) storm: how can i be hotter than rocc0? ive never once spit into a womans x-hole. but yes, i do have yoyr number ;)

STORM 2002-12-10 07:36:35 ET Your sense of the aesthetics is clearly lacking. ::hands you a cup of NOG:: ... for phlegm making purposes. Hahaha

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 07:40:35 ET just thinking about NOG makes me phlegmmy

Insomnia 2002-12-10 09:18:06 ET Can I videotape this?

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 09:37:37 ET well if you are taping, how will you ever participate?

Insomnia 2002-12-10 09:57:33 ET I think that question can answer itself. <---- voyeur, not participant... and being celibate

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 09:59:54 ET i feel that! -creepy voice- i like to watch

Insomnia 2002-12-10 10:00:27 ET -creepier voice- I like to videotape

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 10:03:02 ET apparantly, you just have to stand by storms window and you'll get hours of juicy footage. then you can make millions online...stormsapartment.com

Insomnia 2002-12-10 10:04:22 ET Ooh yeah good idea. We already had the idea to make a Storm & Insomnia calendar. I would seriously do it, she's gotta get the photographer though cause I know none and it would be done done... $$$$$$$

STORM 2002-12-10 10:21:49 ET Dude - it's so on. Zenas is chomping at the bit to reproduce my image. As long as there is lots of nudity and blood involved, he's a happy boy.

Insomnia 2002-12-10 10:24:55 ET nudity and blood? I don't wanna only sell this at porn shops... how about underwear and blood? I'll do it any day, I have *so* many ideas! Jan or Dec - snuggling in blankets like the pics you took June or July - beach shots Oct - multiple costume shots we can do fetishy, normal, cutsey, not... damn, 12 images is a lot to play with! I say blood in February, you know, red is all romantic and shit ;-)

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 10:26:24 ET storm and insomnia calendar?!?! o.0 where do i sign up for advance copies?

deathcondition 2002-12-10 10:32:58 ET nice pic's gus! i see you an storm are sporting your "sexy bitch bodies" in them :)

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 10:36:14 ET haha, did you notice the ghetto L[C] shirt i was rocking in that pic?

deathcondition 2002-12-10 10:45:39 ET yes! hah, thats the shitz yo!

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 10:50:48 ET that was an awesome night. you gotta play again so that we have another mega chill

deathcondition 2002-12-10 10:52:51 ET hell yea, im gonna plan something soon!

Insomnia 2002-12-10 10:53:31 ET Uh oh... you better give the fan club plenty of notice, we gotta outdo our last stint!

deathcondition 2002-12-10 10:54:51 ET maybe i will get real *customized* shirts made for this one! hah

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 10:55:16 ET thats right! hmmm, L[C] underwear?

Insomnia 2002-12-10 10:55:53 ET no can do don't like underwear.

deathcondition 2002-12-10 10:56:58 ET hah, ...don't know if can afford that yet... but we can all share my underwear! haha

deathcondition 2002-12-10 10:57:18 ET PROPOGANDA! ...ohh yes! you love my propoganda!

Insomnia 2002-12-10 10:59:37 ET What is up w/you Chris? You wanna share clothes and now underwear? I mean, I'm glad you feel close to us and all but don't you think it's a bit much? I know you're wearing Cruxshadows underwear anyway, and I can't be having that. . . (btw, propAganda)

deathcondition 2002-12-10 11:00:47 ET my grammar is all farced up! grr hehe

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 11:07:29 ET cruxshadows have underwear products? 0.0 wtf! dont sweat it chris, justine is just an intellektual

deathcondition 2002-12-10 11:08:37 ET heheh ~insomnia my bitterness~

Insomnia 2002-12-10 11:10:36 ET ::shivers:: don't put me in their lyrics! And damnit Gus, I gotta do *something* with all these degrees!

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 11:17:34 ET you know you love it...yes you do and those degrees will come to good use when you write your best selling book: confessions of a rivet slut

deathcondition 2002-12-10 11:19:46 ET haha! "confessions" how dramatic! lol

STORM 2002-12-10 11:34:04 ET The Decameron - 10 tales of a Gearwhore. And I've betrayed the Kommando Kommune... I'm wearing Chris's underwear RIGHT NOW!!! BTW - Gus gus - I've added your sexxy bitch picture to my LUVIES gallery. :) GRRRRR

deathcondition 2002-12-10 11:49:13 ET so thats where they went! :P ::gets draft::

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 11:49:40 ET i dont actually wear chris' underwear, just rub them on my face and neck every morning and since when i have i become a sexxxy bitch? i thought that was bio's domain!

deathcondition 2002-12-10 11:53:00 ET hmmm... well since you made up the phrase "sexy bitch body" i guess by default that means you got one! hah

STORM 2002-12-10 11:55:48 ET I dunno - I lump all you celibate types into the SEXXY BITCH category.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 12:00:15 ET i guess being a sexxy bitch aint too bad better than being called an old bag

Insomnia 2002-12-10 13:09:20 ET not a gearwhore! live with one though...

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 13:58:54 ET thats classic: the kettle calling the pot...

Insomnia 2002-12-10 15:08:36 ET wha?

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 15:17:42 ET -hides-

STORM 2002-12-10 15:20:07 ET HAHAHAHAHAAH *laughs and points*

Insomnia 2002-12-10 15:41:58 ET am not. ::pouts::

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 15:44:26 ET :x

slaad 2002-12-10 15:51:40 ET Re: actual entry. I hear you. I so can't approach people... if they introduce themselves to me or something, than yeah, it's okay. But it's not like girls ever approached me.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 16:01:00 ET it is really tough. sometimes i do it just to challange myself...like a dare. i just try to start a conversation...and ive found the simple questions work best (ie. whats your name?) it doesnt pay to try to be too clever or charming. and most times they have a boyfriend so it doesnt even matter, youve made a friend. and i am very fine with that. thats what i want, basically.

slaad 2002-12-10 16:30:18 ET That's the thing... everything I'd think of saying in my head always sounded waaaay too much like a line, so I'd talk myself out of. A cute female friend is always a bonus. Can never get enough cute female friends :)

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 16:36:01 ET no you can't ever have enough! things that are good icebreakers: the beforementioned name question. or just go up and start dancing with them first then start talking later. eye contact and smiles work well. a compilment on clothing, hair, shoes, dancing works most times. (but you have to mean it) just be fine with whatever comes from it. expect nothing. oh jeez! i'm giving advice! wtf! im a total moron when it comes to ladies! disregard everything i've said!!!

slaad 2002-12-10 16:44:17 ET I've been told complimenting on things they can change - such as hair, shoes, clothing, etc works. Wierd. It's a moot point, as I'm not exactly looking these days. Huzzah!

azraeltrigger 2002-12-10 16:53:25 ET me neither. its such no-stress fun outing without that hassle!

squee! 2002-12-10 19:13:53 ET not being online for a couple of days sucks. way too much to read. haha. staying on the sex topic. i want some.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-11 06:53:32 ET so how's the 'get squee down under for a booty call' fund working out? ;P

squee! 2002-12-11 09:12:19 ET absolutely horrible! haha.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-11 09:24:08 ET oh no! how much is a ticket anyways?

squee! 2002-12-11 19:05:58 ET ticket = about $2000. heh.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-11 20:40:07 ET dang! that is foul!

squee! 2002-12-11 20:41:49 ET yes, extremely foul.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-12 11:21:00 ET sorry dear :[

slaad 2002-12-12 17:01:50 ET To get to Aus, squee? Wierd. I can get to the US (LA) and back for $1400au.

azraeltrigger 2002-12-12 17:05:02 ET i'd imagine it'd be cheaper from LA

slaad 2002-12-12 17:19:49 ET Yeah, I can't remember the prices off hand to other parts of the US.

squee! 2002-12-15 19:22:31 ET well, yeah...LA is on the other side of the country ;) so...it's a much cheaper flight.

Return to azraeltrigger's page