2003-10-14 05:29:10 ET

I have realized that the early morning provokes too much thought. And brings on conversation of points in my life that have given me the anger problem I now today possess.
I would like to think of myself as an un-materialistic person, yet sometimes all I want are things of my own, and a place that I can unleash creativity on. Soon, I will be working basically 24/7. At least that's what i'm trying for. I'm not sure if it's this place, the fact that i'm inside most of the time, or the fact that I haven't been creative in a long time, but I feel a bit more bothered than usual.

As for this weekend so I can get off myself, it was alright, had some decent human contact. hung out with Tina and her hubby, drank and conversed. Had a great time, sometimes all I need is a little basic human contact. Sunday, V's friend Ski and two chicks (that I regret to inform I am horrible at names) came over and we drank and watched a movie. Interesting to say the least. But that was my weekend and I can at least say i'm keeping my tolerance.

These are times that we hold dear, and hold us to our fate.
These are the days in which something unseen grasps us forcefully at the base on the thigh. And the minute we scream is the moment our fear becomes reality. And our reality, is nothing more than the meaningless magnet that holds some piece of past that we think means something.
Even if it's insignificant, and oh don't we know it is.

Au revoir.

2003-10-14 05:55:16 ET

welcome to what I call, cabin fever. all you want to do is run yourself into the walls continually. Get out and walk around the complex when you have a smoke. that's my suggestion.

and im glad you guys had a good time on sunday. im still pissed off about it.

2003-10-14 06:00:04 ET

why didn't you come?

2003-10-14 06:02:19 ET

*big fat sigh of frustration* the girl who was supposed to babysit? well, let's just say I haven't heard from her since Thursday. No calls, etc. My neighbor ended up saying she could babysit for us around 7. We tried to call, but no one answered the phone (and we called a lot too! lol) so we gave up all hope and watched Moulin Rouge. lol

2003-10-14 06:09:52 ET

You should have showed up, we went to Hooters and had dinner after V's gig, we got here about 8:30. It was an interesting night all aside the fact we watched bring down the house. watching movies and tv aren't exactly my favorite things to do while drinking. Cabin fever is getting the best of me. I'm losing my melon.

2003-10-14 06:16:17 ET

grrr, Im still so mad I missed it. grr grr grr. lol. see, i dont mind watching movies and tv, but i much prefer conversation and music.

i did end up watching hellraiser Sat night. that movie sucked. lol. try having cabin fever all the time. lol. if i had a car, i would come save you and we could come over here and consume much coffee. but no, the bastard husband took it to work. =)

we thought ya'll were mad at us! lol

2003-10-14 06:25:29 ET

No way, I really couldn't see myself being angry with you.
I should have borrowed V's car today. I do need to go and put some applications in. That way I don't completely lose my mind. because cabin fever and me dont mix well.

2003-10-14 06:28:38 ET

it's possible, i think everyone gets mad and annoyed at me sometimes. even myself.

where are you turning in apps? if you wanted to work at red lobster, i could talk to my neighbor about it. shes a waitress there. i took a diet pill today trying to get some energy and it isn't working. i need a rockstar. =)

2003-10-14 06:35:33 ET

Damnitt, thats what I should have asked him for before he left, I still have yet to try one.
It takes alot for me to be annoyed or angry with other people, I could be angry with myself often, but I give people a shiteload of chances. I'm about to make some coffee. Damn my dependancy on caffiene.

2003-10-14 07:35:17 ET

mmm, coffee. i should make some too. you know, i think im going to. caffiene is such a wonderful addiction. oh, and you have fancy pants internet... go check it out! =) fancy fancy =)

2003-10-14 07:41:46 ET

haha. yes caffiene is a wonderful addiction until my over-caffieneated kidneys start to kill me.
when do you want me to cut, dye, and fancy your hair?
i'm in a creative mood. haha

2003-10-14 07:44:27 ET

whenever. im hella broke though, so there goes the dye. but i can butcher it whenever =) just dont make me cry. lol

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