on bisexuality
2009-12-10 19:21:17 ET

it appears that there is a lot of distrust when a person identifies themselves as bisexual. in my experience we are ridiculed even more by both straight and gay orientations. i am sure that are many who identify as bisexuals who are just going through phase, transitioning, or just curious. however to classify all bisexuals as greedy, promiscuous, and concluding that we do not know what we want is particularly hurtful and isolating. i write this post to meet more bisexuals both men and women and hear their thoughts, i encourage you. i write this post to represent bisexuals who are certain its not just a phase and who do not feel the need to "choose" because ultimately we have chosen love. i write this post in acknowledgment of those who maintain a self reflection practice to continually be honest, safe and open in all their intimate relationships. i write for myself first and foremost understanding that i am worthy of love, compassion, and trust just as much as anyone else. much love.

shamelessly yours always


2009-12-11 15:07:09 ET

I hate the fetishism of bisexuality- like my attraction to women is a bonus for the men in my life. A source of entertainment.

I hate how it's not considered a real form of sexuality. It's something that's just- me. I don't think about it, I just am.

2009-12-12 07:05:07 ET

thank you for saying something.i have a few friends that are bisexual too, but they are hushed about because of some past experiences that they had where they were ridiculed. you know, i am not trying to be all political or anything about it, i just want to more people who are actually and just keep the dialogue going and have some support.

2009-12-12 07:52:07 ET

i think people don't like people being bisexual because they've developed black and white views regarding sexuality. these people that try to argue that there's this gene that makes you gay, for example, are totally basing it on a this or that mentality. i think there's a lot of hate for gay folk because their existence challenges straight people to realize there are other possibilities out there and then ask questions about themselves that they aren't comfortable asking.

likewise, i think the bisexual person makes the gay folk realize the same thing. In some cases i'm sure it's worse because the gay community has organized, tried to fight political battles and caught a lot of grief for it fro many parts of society, but now they see other people having sex with their own gender who don't identify as gay and again, it challenges their mental view of their own self-identity.

2009-12-12 09:54:41 ET

I've stopped using the term bisexual and found "queer" more appropriate. Oddly, I have problems with the term "heteroflexible" when used outside an S/M context.

The pidgeonholing doesn't really help, but I understand the need for common terms to keep up communication. The labels just seem so *loaded* these days.

2009-12-13 10:32:43 ET

thank you jake. i agree with you. i know what you mean, i barely use the term either. i just say who i like or love when i like or love them. labels are definitely heavy these days...

2010-01-31 15:59:21 ET

I live in a small town in ND and if i tell one person i'm bi or like women more than i should, it gets around and then no one likes me because of that.. mostly because it being small and a 'church' town (hopin you know what i mean).. i'm looked at as if i'm a horrid person.. i am married with three kids now and some people who recognize me don't ignore me they give me the evil eye and stuff lol..

truthfully i find it funny really... specially old people who do it...

2010-02-08 01:50:29 ET

I have always felt this way for a very long time. I hate that people think that bisexuals want to have sex with everything and everyone all the time.I am person who is incapable of being faithful. Automatically I am slut who will take it anyway...and don't you dare treat me with respect.

Funny thing is I've always embraced my sexuality. I've always know who I was. I assume that everyone else has also. I mean they don't choose who they are attracted to yet some how they think that I can?

I just want to be happy like anybody else, I just don't know if my soul-mate is a male or female.

I don't think I should be ridiculed for that?

2010-02-12 19:35:47 ET

I am bisexual and have always been very proud of who I am. Its a part of me. I hate the stereotypes that come with it. I hate that people think because I am bisexual that I have to have both genders or that I am all about 3somes. I believe in love and do not believe that it can be confined to gender. If I love a man or woman it doesn't matter to me as long as there is happiness.

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