2004-08-18 18:29:55 ET

i am such a cow.

why is it so hard to just accept that i am a complete cow and move on? there has got to be someone out there that wants to be with me. even if not, then i'd have enough time to do whatever it is that i wanted to do.. right?

such a cow.

2004-08-18 18:36:50 ET

Awwww. Finding someone has nothing to do with weight or aesthetics. :]

Believe me, I've seen some pretty rank fat people in love!

2004-08-18 18:42:30 ET

a cow? oh come on.

Too bad we live in different countries, because I would looooooove to take you out, on looks alone, even if you weren't such a cool chick. So stop all that complainin'

2004-08-18 18:42:48 ET

Telling yourself you're a cow doesn't really start any sort of positive chain reactions, Rachel! From what I've seen of you, you're not a cow. If you want to lose weight though, it IS hard. I remember when I first started dieting - well, more of just eating less at every meal - I thought that I wasn't going to be able to do it, and voila, 10 lbs. less and several sizes smaller [I used to not be able to wear anything smaller than a 12, now I can squeeze into a 3 or a 4 sometimes], I'm happy I made the effort.

Maybe I misinterpreted this entry, a little.

2004-08-18 19:11:45 ET

i am too... *starts eating grass* mooooo.

2004-08-18 20:47:33 ET

Rachel... stop. I'm going wake up early and call you to cheer you up... not as early as today as I don't have to be work at 7... but if I fail know I had the thought in mind.

And there is plenty of people who want to be with you... I even know a few... actually that's a lie I only know two, but I know OF a few and one I know happens to *ahem* be *ahem*.. nevermind.

I love ya Rach... and it'll pass soon ok? I know it's horrible and if you need to put any of the burden on me I'll try to carry it.

I got all my strong muscles (stop rolling your eyes!) to help carry it.

2004-08-19 03:02:56 ET

aw thanks guys. but i did mean cow in the british sense. you guys are adorable.

i am still stuck on whether to let him go or keep trying..

2004-08-19 03:56:35 ET

Aww... well, is he worth trying for?

And use NORMAL terms, I know you're Canadian but COME ON! Just kidding. <3 you.

2004-08-19 08:21:48 ET

We watched Bridget Jones's Diary last night that's why she's talking like a freak.

Rachel he seems to make you more upset than happy... I don't know though but I want you to be happy and you aren't very happy right now.

2004-08-19 11:52:15 ET

thats what i was thinking today at work.. that if he makes me this upset, is it really worth trying for? and i don't know.. leaning towards not.

2004-08-19 21:13:19 ET

I know my opinion is hard to take considering my feelings for you and that's why I don't often comment on things involving him. I don't know if you will really trust me on this but I think he is completely opposite of what you need out of a guy. But I don't want to really get into detail here, if you want to talk you know where to find me ;).

I'm not saying that cause I'm jealous I'm saying that cause you mean the world to me and I only want what's best for you.

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