2004-08-02 14:09:19 ET

So yeah... I did post this on another site before SK so I apologize but nobody ever reads the other one...

So... since I'm such a big PIMP and all... I've decided to do my own take on the dating scene. There's reality shows about checking out people's rooms and ones where a STUD gives advice to some "dud". Well I have comprised a list of things NOT TO DO that I have done on dates...

#1. Taking the girl to see a shitty movie and thinking that she liked it... try and make up a reason why it was so good. Yeah... doesn't work... the chick thinks you have no taste and will make you wait 3 years before you can get another date.

#2. When meeting your dates father... do not forget to laugh at his jokes about getting his daughter home early. If you don't laugh he will think you are just a pretentious asshole. So laugh dammit!

#3. Passing out at your dates house on the first date and waking up at 7:30 in the morning. Parents wake up earlier than that usually and you don't want to have the mom or dad walk in to see you passed out on their daughter's bed... not good.

#4. This goes with Warning #3... do not spend the night at your date's dorm room and wake up to her parents knocking on the door because it's Parent's Weekend. Not easy to hide in a 20x10 box.

#5. Show up to your date's house drunk... parents have keen senses of alcohol cuz they've been around it a lot longer than any of your friends... best bet would be to just call it off.

#6. Do NOT under any circumstances... start hitting on your date's mom infront of her. Even if you are just trying to be nice... girls are jealous human beings.

#7. Going along with Warning #6... Do NOT under any circumstances hit on your date's sister or her friends. If you think the girl is cute do NOT hook up with her until you have met her friends. It's a lot easier to get away from a "friendship" than it is a "girlfriend" and still have free reign to hook up with members of the immediate family and friends.

#8. Do NOT make the mistake of hooking up with a girl that is uglier than a girl that you are already hooking up with... it just makes you look bad and is just downright wrong. Don't downgrade... only upgrade... it just doesn't make any sense.

#9. Do NOT call a girl at 3:00 am so you guys can "meet up and talk"... she knows what you want and if you already haven't gone there with her... you aren't at 3:00 in the morning. Wait til later in the day to call... always better cuz if she does meet up with you at 3:00 am then she wants you to cuddle with her... and that's not fun when all you want is to get some.


...Do NOT make a burnt cd for a girl that's a "friend" and expect her to get the subtle hints from the music lyrics that you have had a crush on her for the last year. Most girls don't even understand complete sentences let alone song lyrics. So take it from me... just come out and tell the girl that you like her before she ditches you for your bestfriend cuz you are too much of a pussy and gave your friend her screenname so he could see if she really liked you... I mean GROW SOME BALLS!!! HAHAHA....

I laughed a lot while writing this.

2004-08-02 15:05:36 ET

you laughed a lot writing it and i laughed a lot reading it. that seems fair.

2004-08-02 18:46:40 ET

...You...have been having a hard time with the ladies lately, haven't you? Oo

2004-08-03 04:56:22 ET


2004-08-03 21:11:12 ET

radical - i'm glad... this was supposed to be very comical.

neko - i think it may be the ladies who have a hard time with me... i just need to meet the right one.

pinksparkle - how so "interesting"?

2004-08-03 21:21:02 ET

Tch...well you certainly have to go through a lot of insanity to find a sane person in this world! ^^' ...And that's just one of the requirements. ^^'

2004-08-03 21:41:11 ET

i think number 8 is the best

2004-08-03 21:51:33 ET

I like #4.

2004-08-03 22:10:29 ET

Man... I love you guys.

2004-08-04 19:37:02 ET

my roomate's b/f basically lived in our room cause he was a loser who did nothing. they didn't care about doing stuff weather or not people were in our room...they were gross. she was going home one weekend so her dad came up to get her and he didn't call before and he walked in on them....i wasn't there thank god.

2004-08-05 12:06:04 ET

Ive always wanted a guy to do #10 and make me a cd with songs that reminded them of me, or songs hinting at there feelings. But I have yet to meet a guy who actually has done that.

2004-08-05 15:09:45 ET

I almost did that for a guy a while ago, terrible. ^^ I was going to make him a tape (back before CD burners were really out), just of lines of songs that told him how I felt about him, how special he was, and then stick it in his locker from an 'anonymous' person. I never did though.

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