2004-07-19 11:57:36 ET

I want to have the warm fuzzies about someone.
I want to have fun.
I want to fall in love at least once.

ramblings mild poem format. Written April 8th at 1:24am

I've never been in love
I donít know what it's like
I wonder if I want it
Or if I will ever find it
Maybe people like me werenít meant to fall in love
I don't really know
It hurts more than I let on
I wish I wasnít human
I wish I were just this
I want to be a robot
So I cant feel the hurt
I see people in love everyday
Itís hard to watch them
I just smile and go on with my day
Iím rhyming now but not for real
I feel as if I am missing pieces
Like I am just an unfinished puzzle
Maybe that some day someone
Will help me find all the pieces
Who knows for sure?
If some of the pieces even exist
I donít, you donít
Only God knows and he is not talking
At least not out loud for any one to hear
You never know what is there
Until you go looking for it
I suppose thatís how it works
Unfinished until the day you die
That day the last puzzle piece is added
Finishing you and life is done
I hope I find my pieces
I donít want to live forever
Just long enough to experience life
May be have children
And watch and see if they can do what they want.

from last year november

Living life so lost and scared
Feeling the need to be come prepared
Wanting to feel the freedom with in
Only to find the terror of where Iíve been
Soullessly wandering through the ruins of my life
Trying to find out how to defeat strife
Hating all of what I have become
Spinning so fast my body goes numb
Wondering when this will all end
Finding only no reason to bend
Living in fear of what must be
Realizing my only enemy is me
So what am I to you, friend or foe?
The question so simple, but never to know
Now this is the life I have chose to live
All to realize, that love is like a sieve
Forever forgotten in my bricked up heart
The wall Iíve built wonít allow us to start.

2004-07-19 12:38:03 ET

your writes such purdy words!

2004-07-19 12:51:09 ET

that was great and i hope you know i know how you feel

2004-07-19 15:06:31 ET

Thank you tabby.. your such a sweetie

I am glad that im not the only one.. Huggies to Christine..

I love you guys.

2004-07-19 15:07:37 ET


2004-07-19 15:07:42 ET


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