2003-10-30 21:57:57 ET

Today was so beautiful but I can't help but think about how I've been feeling so crappy lately. This stinks. Everything is starting to pile up in my classes. It seems like I have so much to do. I hate it. If only the end of the semester would come sooner. Hopefully next semester won't be so bad. I want to take one of those lame 1-credit kinesiology classes or whatever they are- the gym-like ones. I want to do soemthing different and new like figure skating or rock climbing or scuba diving or some strange sport. aah. to relax. how fun!

I miss being home.
I miss being with my family.
I miss seeing their faces and telling them I love them.
I miss being held.
I don't want to do homework.
I don't want to go to class.
I don't want to eat or sleep or go to work.
I don't want to be alone.
I feel dizzy.
I feel sick.
I feel like everything around me is moving 100mph but I'm standing still.
I feel lost.
I'm tired of thinking.
I'm tired of missing.
I'm tired of smiling and telling people to "have a great day".
I'm tired of pretending.
I want to go on vacation and relax.
I want to start anew.
I want to be around my friends and laugh and tell them how much they mean to me.
I want to vomit.

2003-10-30 22:10:54 ET

I always feel better during spring semester for some reason. maybe it's the increasing light.

feel better soon!


2003-10-30 22:15:30 ET

same here! i always do better in my classes then also.
maybe i should only go to school in the spring and summer?

thanks, and i'm sure once i can de-stress i'll start to feel better.

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