2008-05-07 17:50:05 ET|
Today is the Israeli national independence day, celebrating 60 years since it has been declared a legit country.
I live in Tel Aviv which is basically the only sorda decent city in this country. the city council spent great deal of our tax money on stupid parades and stuff like that, and there is a street party in my old neighbourhood which is supposed to be sweet.. great deejays playing groovy sets on the main street, alcohol is probably being spilled there like waves at a stormy sea, as we speak. the original plan was being there, me, gal (the bf) and our lovely dog, Lunna. one happy jewish family getting drunk in southern TA. but fate had a different artistic program. Lunna got sick, she has been vomiting for 2 days now and seemed generally odd. so we took her to the vet this morning and it appears she has some unexplainable bleeding going on (lets just say she's not having anal sex anytime soon). the vet has sentenced her to a 5 day gradual fast, and when asked if we are aloud to take her out this evening, he strictly answered: no. so Gal went to work after all, and i stayed here with the dog.
I feel shitty nowdays due to the fact it takes quite a while finding a decent job, and im not willing to compromise on certain stuff. i owe lots of money to the bank by now, position which i really hate being in, and still owe money to my former roommates. im not going to see a dime out of the first salary i'll get. the whole situation makes me feel like shit and i've gotta vent it somehow, so i pick on Gal. nothing serious, but still. i oughta be the perfect girlfriend or something. im trying my best not acting as a cunt, but then again, im only human. i dont have a clue where the line is drawn between those 2 poles.
I know that once i'll find a job everything will be awesome. cuz everything besides us not having money is. im just scared that im getting too comfortable sitting at home cooking and bumming. that im looking for excuses to maintain this shitty status. i dunno really. hope not.