From this week's Onion
2003-11-26 21:04:44 ET

Stuff On Floor Either Cat Food Or Cat Shit

LODI, NJ—The moist, brownish pile on the Gehrke living-room floor is either cat food or cat shit, sources reported Monday. "If I had to guess, I'd say it's cat food," said Lydia Gehrke, 44, staring at the mystery heap. "But the way Oscar's been digesting lately, cat shit is definitely a possibility, too." Though a long shot, Gehrke noted that it could also be cat vomit. "Whatever it is," she said, "it involves the cat."


My thighs massively hurt tonight due to the constant up/down, up/down I was doing today with stocking CDs. I need a massage! Where is the grouch when I need him? I forgot to mention I did this all day on three hours worth of sleep. Stupid body deciding to be awake at five AM and not letting me fall back asleep until an hour before I had to be up for work...

2003-11-26 21:09:12 ET

that's top reportage. good investigative work.

2003-11-26 21:10:25 ET

it hit a little too close to home.

2003-11-26 21:13:33 ET

i don't have cats to know. I didn't see "the Onion" part, so that explains it all.... wacky stuff.

  Return to Washu's page