and wheneer that happend my mom freeks out, cuz you kno unless you live the perpetual night party then a call at that time means T-R-O-U-B-L-E.
so that was my news this morn.
i am not going to call him cuz i will see him in 3 days!
2002-11-29 21:28:09 ET
arrrrggggggg
ok alot of ppl have been bringing up "issues" with the infamous boi tonight.
and its been hard enuff for me to dela with all this bullshit on my own let alone be reminded of all the others.
so i just don't know what to do its constantly in my mind and preventing me from sleeping its driving my nerves out of the roof.
AND i was just informed that me and star will most definately be seeing him next wekend on our many trips to vancouver.
i have to total craving to slap him in the ass. or kick him in the junk. but i kno that once i see him the overwhelming sensations of the unknown and admired will be once again. but that would require some eye contact let alone mere presence of conversation.
|shakes fist| i swear i know i will breakdown i just cant handle this shit anymore and i am sick of basing my life on all the what ifs. why can't i ever fall for a boy that had the fukken guts to do something about the way he feels. i mean if someone can't proclaim the intense love they have for someone to their face then what is the point. i know i am blaming it all on him and that i could do it and save us both from this horrid painful touture. but honestly i think its too late i just cant deal with all the bullshit.
i am sorry to those of you that read this and have no fukken clue whut i am talking about. but i am very very depressed and had a bit too much to drink and bah.
i dont bring my personal problems to this website much so thats why this entry is fukked.
i hate thm here tho cuz they are thin paper and you cant lainate them also our photo ids (drivers license) are still laminated pieces of shit that anyone can make easily. so no one believes its real id and i cant get my bc id until i have a residnce. and i need both pieces to get across the border to seattle.
|shakes a fist|
whut tha hell shud i do now. i wish i had a scanner so i could show you guys our lame ids!
some people are destined for hell.
big city girls boen in small secluded towns is the worst fate ever!