2007-04-10 07:17:49 ET|
Ok. Fight with husband yesterday is still bugging me. It didn’t intend to be a fight. I approached the subject from a view of “you are hurting and I can’t stand by and watch it.”
My husband is an artist: Temperament, sensitivity, and needs to create. Lately, because life had not been real easy, not easy since the move, He has shut down. He made a couple of paintings this last December for Christmas presents but other than that, not even any random stick drawings or surprise wire roses.
Have you ever lived with someone whose entire existence is to create and he is doing nothing?
The sarcastic, playful, opinionated man whose daily goal is to leave some stranger speechless is missing. In his place is left a vacant and untalkative wound who just wants to be safe.
WE can spend WHOLE DAYS in the same house and no words are said besides me asking if he’s hungry for lunch etc…
I’ve tried to encourage by example… I have project piles about the house I am working on. Patterns for some new clothes, the lamp I am painting to look like stained glass, scrapbooks I am sure I will never finish and I even pulled out a watercolor I started a year ago.
No bug in butt to start working on his own. He sits around, makes speeches about responsibility and mows the lawn.
So I told him how I felt yesterday. I pleaded with him to start something. Set up a canvas, work on a script, work on his book, anything.
It became a fight. Am I in the wrong? Is it my part to stand by him as he gives up this piece of his life?