Another rant    2009-02-14 17:03:52 ET
because, really, what else is a journal for?

Last year I was working at 24 hour fitness under a district manager who saw me as someone he could manipulate. I let him move me from club to club to yet another club in hopes that he would promote me and allow me to join the ranks of the elite slackers that make money off of fat people. He made promise after promise and finally I said enough is enough. I took matters into my own hands and asked around in the denver area if anyone was looking for a manager or assistant to hire in their club immediately. I found a position and, because it would not only get me the hell away from mr. douchebag it would bring me closer to my band, I took the job. This guy was worse. seriously.

So I quit and took a job day managing the taco bell next door to me saying it would only be a temporary solution until I found something I really loved. I got lazy and never went looking for a new job. In November I nearly got into a fist fight with a customer and threw a load of dishes at a trainee. So, my boss and I agreed that taco bell might not have been the place for me.

I went hunting and after a very short while found a gig selling shoes at the downtown mall. This guy was friendly and really seemed to appreciate my apparent knack for making sales. We went through all the hoops and ended with a " I should have your background check in Monday, give me a call and we'll figure something out." So I quit taco bell with a huge smile on my face.

I called this dick everyday for a week with no response. Then the holidays hit and there was no hope of getting a hold of anybody in retail. So I resolved to really hit the pavement Jan 1st. New year, new job, new city, this was gonna be fucking great.

I still don't have a job. I went and interviewed with serveral banks, all denied me because of my credit. I finally got approved for a job with spring mobile and phrases like " you will be an amazing asset to us" were thrown about. They too just stopped calling me. I've been looking to do odd jobs I find on craigslist and such but everytime, they call me the day I'm supposed to come work for them and cancel.

Needless to say, I'm fucking livid. I have no idea where rent is coming from and it's due next week. I have done everything I can and nothing good has come of it. I will be going to Burger King tomorrow to see if they need a cashier.

The really shitty part is: I see people every single day who exist more selfishly than I do, who squander what they've got and I see them constantly happier. It's not typical of me to think this way but maybe being an asshole and worrying only about #1 is really the key to success.

Basically, I'm fucked. So now, I have to figure out how I'm going to tell my mom that I've broken all my promises to fix things and not to let her down. So yeah... my emo rant is over now.

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