2002-09-20 13:25:38 ET|
well thats it, now i've gone and done it.. i'm running a fever.. really bad.. ive had it for like 3 days.. and im shaking and cold but i know its not really cold.. i slept for 16 hours yesterday... and im really tired now but i can't sleep... played hooky from work (actually passed out on the train, almost on another passenger) woke up 8th ave 4 stops away from where i needed to be... then discovered that i forgot my bank keys (only the ones to the vault so i could have still gone in without issue) but i was in no shape to keep going, esp. being that you cant eff up when you're working w/other ppl's money... so instead i went to the store and spent my last $8 on batteries for my keyboard/midi controller... then Insomnia took me to the store with her... bought me fever medicine.. took care of me etc.. (though im sure she's sick of it by now)... then dragged me to get *gulp* A MANICURE. now that is the girliest thing i have ever done. so here i am, playing hooky from work, getting a manicure.. life is rough.. well at least now my nails match my cellphone, computer and scanner.. gunmetal silver.. my favorite color..
i once had a friend with a problem with depression.. self inflicted like me... and after a while our paradigm threatened to destroy all others i had around me.. so
Because my sister requested it- a piece i wrote around her age.. 4 years ago
reduced to black corduroy, covering bone
soggy and wet, and very alone
temptation most potent (duration unknown)
as long as i stand here, we both stand alone.
afraid of each other/of crossing the borders
these feelings lash out with no logical order
they tear down two worlds with no time to recover
they tear down our lives/they tear down our lovers
they burn with a speed, and a hellish white wrath
that eats away flesh, that cuts a swift path
down the porcelain sculpture that serves as your face
(so these are the dreams of the tears that i taste)
as i follow these traintracks, my world fades to black
i kiss them away but they keep coming back
like a petulant child lashing out, but in vein
and burning your face like industrial rain.
okay the fever has gotten too bad now.. i have to run back home... play w/computer... sleep, something... *smacks arm* stop shaking already!!!! *meh*
</over and out>
"when i was a child, i had a fever, my hands felt just like two big balloons. now i have that fever once again, i cant explain, you would not understand; this is not how i am."
-pinkfloyd, comfortably numb