Self-Pitty Party2008-01-07 17:50:01 ET

Quinten really has a way of making me feel like shit.

I'm imature and a statistic of the rest of america. FAT and DUMB. He doesn't understand how I make friends with "older" more mature people because I am the way I am. It made me feel like I have nothing that distinguishes me or makes me great or worth having as a friend.

I already feel bad enough about myself. I look at almost every day as a day I have failed and not accomplished anything. I never seem to be able to right the mistakes I have made. They just keep getting thrown back in my face.

I feel like a fat, stupid annoying failure. Quinten just adds fuel to the fire.

I guess he is right though what do I really have going for me? I stay at home, I don't have any real schooling other than just graduating high school, and I'm not really good at anything. My photography isn't really any good. There are 15 year old out there getting their work published and I can't even seem to take a decent portrait. They are all the same it seems. There is nothing else i can do either. I try drawing and thats no good, I can't sing anymore my voice is ruined, so what is there? I wish I could really excell at something that I enjoy doing, but it doesn't seem that I ever will.
2 comments

Got to go out last night!2008-01-05 05:53:27 ET

My hubby and I got to go out last night. We went to the Taphouse to see one of my friends band play.

Mojave Heat Bomb http://www.myspace.com/mhbs

You should check them out sometime. Any ways there were a couple other band there. Dynamite Plan and Robot Goes Here. Both were really good. Robot Goes Here was crazy. If you get a chance to see any of them take it.

The Taphouse has a large menu of imports from ales to beer to cider. They also have really great food. Its a great place to go and hang out.

Well I guess thats all for now. THE END

Am I just a pawn in your game?2008-01-02 16:00:11 ET

Do you really mean what you say or do you say it just to keep me hooked. Am I just to fall back on when you can't find someone better? Do you really want me or are you just settleing for me? The seed of doubt has been planted and you are making it grow quick and strong.

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