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2007-11-19 16:22:18 ET I was looking for a dress to wear to the ships Christmas party, and I went in to Nordstroms. I don't know why it was just one more place I could look because I struck out every where else. Well me being me checked out the non-plus size dresses first. I found a really pretty one and went to try it on. I got it on ziped with just a little effort and the top was to small for my large chest. When i went to get the dress of I couldn't get the zipper undone. The zipper had broken and they had to cut a 500.00 dress off of me. I was so humilated. I just want to look pretty and attractive for the party and I realized today that I can't ever look pretty or attractive. I'm stuck being the lump that is me. All the dresses that would fit me were just pices of fabric sewn together they had no shape and weren't flattering at all and I refuse to break down and wear something like that. I'm so sick of myself but when I try to diet and exercise or watch my portions it only last for like a day. I feel like I'm starving myself and I'm always hungry. I don't know whats wrong with me i hate how I look but I just can't seem to get myself to not eat so much. Portion is a big problem for me. I don't know what to do. I wish I could just dissapear. (Sorry for the horrible spelling.) |
