2003-03-21 17:51:47 ET




     2003-03-13 12:42:54 ET
my sinus are infected...

my head is leaking...

i am coughing a lot...

it is gross...
4 comments

     2003-03-10 13:01:08 ET
i feel very sick, my throat hurts and is very scratchy, i feel weak, blah blah blah.... how pathetic am i, i hate being sick, i hate knowing that theres nothing i can do about it, i'm obiviously a control freak when it comes to my own body. Thats probably why i don't dance, i have never ever danced...Except in 7th grade and once in 9th all those years ago when i went to school, and that doesn't count, i do bob my head at shows, so thats kind of like dancing, right?

This is probably why i enjoy things like car accidents so much, funny how that works, i hate being sick because its a loss of control but i love car accidents, it most be the wreakage that makes the difference, yeah i know what your thinking, if he's so controlling with himself he must be horrible to poor little mizz ayn (my grrl also on SK.net), but strangely enough i have never tried to be controlling with other people, its strictly a personal discpline. the spread of this also seems to infect how i feel about people with out personal control, i find myself getting disgusted with most males who can easily be lead around by the cock.

women are slightly more self controlled than men, it most have a lot to do with cultural pressures, the woman must be the guarded individual and the male is the wild hunter....god i must be sick i didn't mean for this to be an introspection on masculine and femanine properties...

but in general self control is something that our society doesn't teach anymore....

     2003-03-09 19:41:03 ET
its getting to the point where i can't turn on the television with out wanting to throw up... i am pretty damn sure that there are multiple realities out there due to my psychotropic expriences, i've also at times felt that A. i was being "watched" and B. jumping between them to avoid potentially deadly situations (like falling asleep at the wheel only to wake up 10 miles down the highway with out having veered off or anything) its a hard thing to descripe and its most likely some sort of toxic schitzophrenia hallucination/derangement...well today i had a suddenly realization...i've jumped into some reality that closely mirrors that one i'm from, except that all of human kind is now EXTREMELY FUCKING STUPID!!!!!

i mean a republican president, a deja vu war on the same damn country as his daddy, all the liberals losing there spines....this has got the makings of one strange ass trip...lucky enough for me, acid magically appears on the market when ever america goes to war....hopefully i can catch a ride home....
9 comments

     2003-03-09 13:55:13 ET




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