Getting Screwed On The Staten Island Ferry

2004-09-28 17:35:16 ET For anyone that cares: The new 4,500 passenger Staten Island Ferry boat, the Guy V. Molinari, made its debut yesterday (Monday). --- A depressed young woman was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said: "Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy." The girl nodded 'yes.' After all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a life-boat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" the Captain asked. "I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "He's taking me to Europe, and he's screwing me." "He sure is, lady," said the Captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry." 4 comments

Earthquake Proofing Your State

2004-09-28 14:22:59 ET I've heard there was an earthquake in California. I really hope everything is ok but... I just don't understand you guys. If you don't want earthquakes then you can stop them quite easily with this tried and true method of mine. You see, the rumblings occur deep down in the belly of the beast. They signify geological hunger. And what else should we feed to the very depths of the earth if not... virgins? 6 comments

QuickClot and Chaos Magick

2004-09-26 20:16:11 ET Hmm... I'm thinking about getting into Chaos Magick again. I don't believe in it so that should prove quite interesting. P.S. I think this is greatness: http://www.uscav.com/productinfo.aspx?productid=7889&tabID=1&categoryID=60&pos=33 1 comment

Wow. A personal entry.

2004-09-26 19:24:02 ET I went outside a few minutes ago with the beast Bonnie so she could run around in the yard for a while and do her business. There is so much light pollution outside. I'm not complaining. It's great. Like an artifical form of some permanent twilight. You can walk around at 3 in the morning with your head all clear and the streets lone and abandoned and seeing things in a different light. It's hard to describe. When I went back in I remembered about the silkworms. My mum had brought them home from school and we kept them in shoeboxes stuffed with the leaves of this silkworm tree. I dont know its English name and I've forgotten the Russian one. The leaves are mostly gone now and the bottoms of the boxes are littered with tiny little fecal pellets. The worms are gone too, they've wrapped themselves in cocoons of strong silk where they will mutate and evolve. Right now they look like cotton balls caught in a web. In other news, I've been looking at buying some Russian handguns when I'll finally get some sort of money source. What with my screwy college schedule and all a job is out of the question. Not to mention that with my fucked up attention span and chronic procrastination I'm barely keeping up with my work. I might be fucked but it's too early to tell. What's worse is that it's my mum's money so... Come winter time though I'm definately going to have to find work. I've been offered a security job someplace that pays quite well or I might go the way of a friend of mine and get A+ certified. Then I'll be able to join some sort of computer repair shop. Once I'll have the cash I'm going to buy the following: Mosin Nagant (Probably a Romanian M44 since they're cheap and short) 1938 Nagant Revolver Makarov (Chambered in 9x18 Makarov and not .380 ACP. I'll get a .380 barrel though so I could play around with both rounds.) CZ 52 (It's a Czech version of the Tokarev with a few improvements. It fires the potent 7.62 x 25 Tokarev round. There's a version that fires 9mm Luger rounds but it's not as powerful.) Since the licensing fees for firearms in NYC are insane I'm probably going to buy these through a friend in Vermont and I'll store and shoot them there until I'll be able to move to a more gun-friendly environment. But that all depends on a lot of things. Anyway, I think this might be my first personal entry on SK. I just figured I'd write something different for a change. And now I must go do some English 110 homework I've been putting off for... oh about a week. 5 comments

"Barber... Doctor... they both cut things." - Herr Ripper

2004-09-23 18:08:39 ET So I've finally got my hair circumcised cut. Please pardon the deer-in-the-headlights look. 7 comments

Vegetarians steal grass from cows.

2004-09-23 02:39:56 ET I got home from college at 6pm yesterday and proceeded to pass out. I just woke up a few minutes ago. It's 7am. Stupid brain demons.

Sweet Jebus

2004-09-22 06:58:02 ET I just came in my pants. http://ep.espacenet.com has PDFs of patents from a shitload of countries. They have a search database consisting of the patent abstract and applicants going back to the beginning of the last (20th) century. That's further back than the USPTO patent server ( http://www.uspto.gov/patft ) goes with its search database. I've been looking at various Tesla patents written in Serbian I think. A good lot of them are for mechanical things as he was not only an electrical engineer but also a great mechanical engineer. 8 comments

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