This helped me before2007-10-02 05:39:21 ET

I made little reminder posters and put them on my bedroom mirror, the cabinets in the kitchen and on the fridge door. I counted every single calorie(as best I could) and followed my rules and it worked.

Hopefully it will work again.



I'm setting myself up for failure...2007-10-02 04:54:59 ET

So while my husband was on deployment I think I gained a total of 20lbs maybe more. I had lost about 15 before he left due to watching what I eat and we would go to the gym together almost everyday. It was wonderful I felt good about myself and compaired to now I was really little.

I was thinking about how I am going to be moving home this spring and I really don't want to go home and have my friends and family see me this way. I really plan to work on this.

I checked my myspace and facebook, decided to make some pilsberry smores cookies 100 cal each cookie then proceeded to open the refrigerator and looked for something to snack on...I pulled out pepperoni. 12 g of fat in 14 pieces and I know I ate more than that. Then when the cookies were done I had like 3. They are best when they first come out of the oven.

Why do I do this to myself? I can bairly stand to look in the mirror. The clothes I bought because I had lost weight don't fit any more and I want to be pretty not pillowey. Uggg...sometimes I hate myself.
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More pictures...2007-10-01 11:42:28 ET

Taken the other day...I fiddled with these in photoshop a bit.




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