Wow
2005-07-24 05:37:31 ET

4 days ago, a catalyst came to my apartment that would eventually lead to me breaking up with my girlfriend (which needed to be done) getting me completely coked out of my mind for 3 days straight, drunk, my house cleaned, and a crapload of free cigarettes. And now it's gone. Apparently Meagan's official Ex boyfriend is so close with her mother that he told her all the shit that's been going on, and her mother just came to get her. And she isn't coming back. Poor girl is probably going to rehab or something. I still have a few days to talk about all this with my friends before all our leases expire and we'll be moving into different places.

Oi Oi oi, what a freaking week. In the end, I have a clean house, cigarettes, and I've probably made one of my better decisions in life which was to not let a relationship continue that probably never would have worked. And then, the memories of odd times shared with new people. This is one of the times that I say "Wow"

It seems as though these crazy events are over with now, but I have a haunting feeling that this is only the beginning. This is going to come back to bite me on the ass. I feel it.

If I could have foreseen this kind of weird real life shit happening to me, I would have never been such a whiny brat when I lived with my parents. I always wanted weird drama like this to happen to me, and here I have it. It's not what I expected. It's more like me watching a movie, and yet I know it's happening to me. I don't regret any of it, because it's all happening around me, and not to me...
1 comment

Breaking up?
2005-07-23 23:04:54 ET

Nobody ever told me that breaking up with someone is just as bad as being broken up with by someone. This sucks. But I knew it wasn't going to last forever, it couldn't, I wouldn't be happy, and I couldn't show the love really required to continue a healthy relationship.

What a fucking day.. Right now there's this 5'1, 115 LB girl seeping naked in my bed, and I just look at her like "sigh.. whatever" It's funny, we both seem to be going through the exact same situation. She broke up with her 9 month boyfriend today, and I broke up with my 6 month girlfriend today. And we both just needed the push to do it, even though we both feel guilty.

We've had the same kinds of problems, we just can't really break up with someone who wants you so bad, and we just feel guilty, yet talk shit about them behind their backs..

But this has been such a learning experience. I finally have learned to break up with someone who I feel is not right for me, instead of letting the misery grow inside of me. Hopefully next time, I won't just be miserable. I'll know what to do when I have doubts for any large amount of time.

Oh god, rambling. So sorry kids. Any support or thoughts you guys can give would be REALLY appreciated right now.
2 comments

...
2005-07-20 10:31:35 ET

28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, 12 seconds...That's when the world will come to an end.
9 comments

2005-07-19 16:54:07 ET

AHh first mentholated cigarette of the day. This feelssssss gooooood.

Sparkledrive.
2005-07-18 15:41:08 ET

Anyone ever heard of this band? I bet you haven't. I do a google search and come up with year old interviews with the lead singer. They no longer have a record label, and their website doesn't exist any more. :( I went to Dancin' in the district in Nashville and saw these guys play. They rock out, but now they don't exist. I'm sad... So sad. I've got their CD though, so that makes me smile.

Pardon the retarded 14 year old blog style entry.
5 comments

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