rainy day    2008-02-06 04:22:12 ET
i just woke up. today i get to go into work at 11 instead of 8. on mondays and weds we do that, but i hate it bc we get out at 8. i need a new job.

it's so shitty out right now. i'd rather it rain like this than snow though. summer needs to be here, now.

this kid Joe i hung out with once about 2 years ago and spoke to maybe once more after that, contacted me last night. it was awkward that he still knew how to get in touch with me after such long time, but kind of cute. another one of my friends that i haven't seen for about 2 years instant messaged me and we're going to hang out on saturday. this should be interesting since he claimed to have had a "revelation" and has changed (ie now "dresses differently") apparently the "alternative look" revised or something? i told him i don't give a shit what he dresses like and he sounds like a fake when he talks like that, haha. is that what people think the rock and roll genre is all about? the way we dress? assss iffffff. ;-)

ugh, someone get me a strawberry coolatta from Dunkin's please? :-D


 fuck me    2008-02-05 08:30:21 ET
so let's talk about how i have so much work to do at my job right now, and i don't give a fuck. i'm a debt collector and i feel like a 40 year old soccer mom trapped in a 19 year old's body. get me out of here!

where did i find this job and why am i here?
i never thought i'd say this, but i can't wait to go back to school for cosmo and start working at a job i really wanna do! pssh.

honestly, sometimes i think my add keeps me busy. i know i'm not doing what i'm supposed to be doing, but at least i keep myself ... "sane." ha.

all i have on my mind lately is how long it's been since i've been with a female. as psycho as my ex-girlfriend was.. i miss her. well not her herself, but the THOUGHT of her. i talked to Rachel the other day, the lady in my life..whom i've never met (silly, i know)..but i think she's really unstable and tells me things about her life i don't wanna hear so i'm not sure if i want to go see her, ever.. she's really goofy and tall and cute and has big breasts and open-minded, all of which i love about her, so i'm nervous that i'm going to fall for her and she's going to just..use me. she's told me about people she has used before and i don't know if she realizes that she's turning me off by doing so.

any advice?

 lack of sleep makes my mind fucked. ha    2008-02-04 20:31:36 ET
Tragedy? Or is it fate?
Still frames one can’t relate.
Pieces of inner thoughts
Fresh bullet proof shots.
Piteous sentence ‘til dawn,
Thoughts of inspiration, gone.
Unfortunate solitude?
Obstacles with attitude.
Self empathy is foul,
Self doubt's on the prowl.
Speckles of hate on my nerves,
As my composure stars to curve.

 taxes?    2008-02-04 19:12:57 ET
So, i can't sleep.
i have to be up at 6:30 for work.
Ugh, someone punch me. haha.

on a better note!
it's Feb, so TAX RETURNS! :)
yay! that means i get to spend
money on body mods. I want to do
too much though, i'll be spending
hours on end at the parlor, but
that's cool with me. I decided to be
lame and get my belly button redone.
i feel like it completes my tummy,
as uncool as that sounds. and for some reason
no matter how i take care of it (shitty or not)
every time i get my cartilage on my ear
pierced, it gets infected. i can have my
septum..my lip..belly button..anything else
pierced and it's fine, but then when i get
something simple like that, it gets all icky!
what the deuce.
Tattoos, on the other hand, will be
more expensive, thus less obtainable!
but, i will do my best. i can't wait
to get my wrist done and the other
side of my ribs. Reminds me that i need to
post more pics of my tattoos. <3

- becca

ps come snuggle

 numero uno    2008-02-04 15:48:36 ET
so, yea. first entry. always awkward.. nowhere to begin. should i introduce myself? well i'm becca.

i went to work today and sat infront of a computer for 9 hours.. tell me how jealous you are..go ahead...tell me.

I have to go tomorrow with my soon to be sister-in-law to get my bridesmaids dress which is green...did i mention i look like crap in green? yea, thanks.

i felt as though i'd have more to say in this post but maybe a short but sweet entry is good for first. :)

- becca

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