| lalalalla 2004-02-18 11:42:29 ET
I've got machine guns|
And yes theyre lots of fun
We got some bullets
And were mowin everybody down
My mother said all were angels
But I swear I saw the evil
The evil that bleeds from the sky
From the Sky
Just thought you might want to hear some words from NothingFace.
Man I got some confessions but no one to tell them too. Isn't that a bitch? So heres your fair warning If you're not in the mood for some bitching get the fuck out!
1. I need a better job. First off I can't get either job I wanted to have origionally because of my mental condition. Fuck you bastards! I made it through school like this now you wont take me fuck you and shut your fucking lip.
2. My love life is complete shit always has been always will be. Every girl friend I've ever had will never speak to me again. Maybe I deserve it from Kristel but she started treating me like shit first. Do you know what it's like to be laughed at when you ask someone on a date? It's happened 3 times in the past 2 months.
3. I've tried waaaaaaay too many drugs in my life. Some have nearly killed me. Dramamine, alcohol, and corricidine are horrible drugs I learned the hard way. I've gotten into some really hardcore drugs before. And my drug of choice will make me go insane...
4. I have a problem with knives. No I don't mean I hate them. I'm very attracted to them. I think too much so. I know it's a problem that I cut myself. But it's a relief to feel it break my skin and a comfort to watch as the blood puddles on my skin. I'm a freak leave me alone.
5. I hate most everybody. I can think of 10 people at most which I haven't wanted to kill at one point or another.
6. I'm just crazy as shit. I can't get through a day without having some god damn delusion. Or having my imaginary shadow speak to me. I'm ready to quit.
Sorry about all of that. But I don't have anyone else to really talk to and I like ranting. Besides it's semi theraputic and less destructive than other things I could be doin right now.
| Slave 2004-02-18 08:32:14 ET
Yes I am a liar |
Yes I am a sinner
Please forgive my broken soul
We are all slaves to something. It doesn't matter who you are, you are always controled by something else. I am unfortunately a slave to an inanimate object but I enjoy it, do you? Do you know who your master is? Do you purposely serve or do you serve a purpose?
| Sigh again... 2004-02-18 06:27:59 ET
I'm getting tired of my life to be honest with you. Yes random crap happens to me everyday and thats cool and all but I'm way too involved with things and people that will probably be bad for me in the near future. Still there is no one to look forward to seeing at the end of the day. And that is needless to say a very hopless feeling. And seeing some girl everyday after a fucking bad day would be nice, I get to do this anyways but it's with a girl I could never have, and one that I would love to give it all too.|
Still the pain I recieve keeps me strong and it keeps me moving on. Unfortunately this is very true and I have a feeling that I'm addicted to my pain and suffering. It would just be a wierd day without it.
By the way. DO NOT preach at a drive through guy. We get it atleast 3 other times a day and you just might get their wrath. I'm going to hell now, have a wonderful day
| How? 2004-02-17 21:52:31 ET
I don't really know how I made it home tonight... I'm drunker than fuck and high. I really don't know how I made it home I'm soooo fucking stupid :(|
on a side note. I think I've fallen in love with the wrong person.
| Rough weekend 2004-02-16 07:19:51 ET
I don't remember the last time this many bad things happened to me in a 48 hour time period only to have them start on the third day because of presidents day. Tonight I am not leaving my friends appartment, I don't want to get arrested today.|
But to top bad things off there are two lady friends that I have that I would like to say something to. But unfortunately I am to damn shy to say it. *sigh I guess theres always next time...
they still tell me I'm worthless. Still they tell me suicide is a horrible option. Are they really inviting me to fix my problems with their own deaths?
HIDE everyone HIDE it's started! the curse of presidents day!