Updates    2002-06-01 21:03:19 ET
What to say? what to hear? what to draw? what to write? what to think? what to believe? what to do?

Ok, I finally updated both galleries here. I added some more goth ladies draws and my last work, a painting... at oils, pretty incredible, huh?

Well, I'm listening some classical music right now, which reminds me... my violin teacher dyied her hair, it looks pretty cool, like fire, it has yellow and orange mixed very cool. Oh well, today I didn't became so paranoic like other days... I got bored and I just went to slepp. I'll let the depression philosophies for other ocassions. Bye.

 Narrow eyes.    2002-05-31 18:23:42 ET
Today, today was another day, either for sadness or for simple wandering. I got my house fumigated, so I had to be ausent for a few hours. I took a bus with no specific place to go in my mind; I just got down from the bus when I felt rired. I started to walk around there. Then I got tired and sat down in the sidewalk and started reading a book. In front of the street was a store about baby accesories: baby clothes and baby toys, baby stuff. I saw many babies today. I like babies, I love them. How they make this incoherent mechanical movements... so cute, they find everything so fascinating and demostrate it by smiling, oh, that soft and charming smile, that soft and tidy skin, so juicy flesh, so fine and lovely angels.

So, I finished admiring those 1 or 2 year-old babies, and go on my way. I passed infront in the Art Institute where I take my violin lessons. I didn't stoped by there, though I think I saw my violin teacher and a nice friend there, both 18 years old girls. While listening to music with my Cd player I took a bus to come back home. I walked a few block just for stare a while to the dark sky and finally opened the door to me home to get in.

Now I'm home, tomorrow I'll scan the painting I finished and post it here. Until then I'll seek around the internet for some frined's web pages.

 Things to do, music to hear.    2002-05-29 19:06:47 ET
Things are being so... I don't know howw to describe it. Sometimes I don't even want to move a finger, some other times I need to be doing something so I don't have to be thinking in such subjects that no one thinks the same way I do.

I frined lend me 3 albums of Cocteau Twins, I've just heard "Garlands" and it's awesome. But then I also have burned a Cd of many songs of Deadsy, mostly from their first debut, and also hearing of "If_then_else" of The Gathering, oh, all of them are great, so having all these albums to listen to significates I won't have much time to keep listening to heavy stuff such as black metal or heavy metal.

I also have finished my very first painting at oils. I felt very weird. I had never tried before, I even had had too much time by not using any colors, and now... at oils!, weird huh? I'll just wait 'til ot dries off so I can scan it and post it here. Meanwhile, I'll continue drawing a nice photo of a goth girl in a cemetery.

I'm also anxious to be on saturday so a I can have my violin lessons again. They're somehow fun but quite difucult too.

 Enough quizzes!!!! ... I knew it anyway.    2002-05-22 21:52:36 ET
The Depression quizz says:
Your quiz results are consistent with clinical depression.

The Personality Type Test says:

You are IST:
"I" stands for Introversion.
"S" stands for Sensation.
"T" stands for Thinking.

The Depression-Screening.org test says:
Your screening results indicate a high likelihood that you are suffering from clinical depression. Your answers also show you might be at risk for harming yourself.

Some Vampire quizz out there says:

You're Spike. An English badass. At least you were until they put that stupid chip in your head. And then you fell in love with the slayer... Snap out of it, man!

Some Picture personlaity test says:
High Sensation Seeking (HSS) means that you really enjoy high-energy, thrill-seeking kinds of activities.
Introverted Personality Style (IPS) means that your predominant inclination is to follow your inner thoughts, feelings, and motivations.

The Goth Type Test says:
I'm a Romantic Goth.

The Colors quizz says:
BLUE PURPLE BLACK: You're a Pioneer
You think about why people do what they do. By understanding the motivation of others, you seek to create a better world.

...I guess I should have known it.

 Why Am I so bad at it?    2002-05-20 19:15:35 ET
I was trying to draw something by myself hours ago, and I noticed that I cannot draw as well without a patron or model as well I with it. I mean, trying to draw faces by memory (without a foto or model) I suck ass, I just can't unless it's a cartoon or something like it.

One other thing that is too dificult for me, and yet many professional artists have said that is the most dificult human body part to draw, is the hands.
Hands, express so many things as well as eyes, but hands are more dificult to draw. The bad thing I that I can't be drawing and watching my own hands at the same time. I wish someone could pose for me or having a fake (or real) hand there to watch it whenever I want.

I also noticed that I can draw some human figures in specific angles... just the ones I've already drawn at least once.

Mmm.. ok, gotta go now.

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