suck.    2004-04-01 06:55:30 ET
more car troubles: i got my best friend/roommate/auto repair woman extroidinaire to work on my car some. after taking many, many things apart and laying pieces of my car on egg crate foam mats all over the backyard and beating my car's metal down with a hammer, she was able to rig it so that i can open the driver side door just enough to slide into the front seat. anything else i wish to have on me, bookbags, whatever, has to be loaded through the other side of the car. but whatever, i can at least get in the car. i also taped a faux mirror over the broken one and hoped to move on from my tragic wreck. but then yesterday, on my way to school, my emergency brake lights and anti-lock brake lights on my dash came on. i continued to drive around town with my breath held, hoping the brakes weren't going to give at any moment to send me spiraling into a certain death trap for myself and/or others. then on my way home last night i passed a place on broad st. advertising free brake inspections.

so i got another one of my roommates to come with me this morning to go by that place and have my brakes checked out. turns out that i have NO back brakes and haven't ever since the purchase of my car. and since my front brakes have been left to do all the work, they are completely burned out and shredded apart. the repair guy actually burned himself on them when he took my tires off and when he showed what was left of them to me, they were still smoking. pretty much, i have no idea how my car was braking at all. so i have to have my back brakes replaced and everything on my front brakes have to be replaced except one part which will cost me $400. what a fucking suck. i'm so broke right now, it's pitiful. i only make like $200 every other week at my work study job and i just had to spend my entire paycheck for the next two weeks to cover bills that my aforementioned mechanic roommate couldn't pay so that our power and water wouldn't be cut off AGAIN. so here i am trying to figure out how to get food for the next couple of weeks and now i've got to figure out where i'm gonna get $400 as well. plus i have to have this baby fixed immediately cause i'm going out of town tomorrow--oh yes, which will cost even MORE money.

whatever. i officially withdraw myself from this system of capitalism.

that said--i'm willing to take donations. anyone wanna give me money? please?

 BAM.    2004-03-25 07:12:08 ET
i got into a car wreck last night. way, way scarier of a near death experience than the skydiving. i'm not really sure what happened cause i kind of went into shock, but i think i misjudged distance and merged into the back of a tractor trailer truck. oops. i don't think the truck even noticed the hit, it just kept driving while i pulled off the road. i'm mostly okay; my car is not. it's still running which is most important but the entire driver side is fucked. i can't open the door so i'm having to crawl in from the passenger side until i can hook up some dukes of hazard windows. my driver's side mirror is also a thing of the past, so that makes for even more dangerous and illegal driving. i, of course, cannot afford to fix this. what fun. i suck. but i'm alive, so that's good. i suppose.

 and another thing    2004-03-23 10:51:14 ET
one more update: we have decided on a theme for the party we're promoting. it's going to be "punk rock burlesque." there will be two punk bands playing (the voxals - - and the drama queens - as well as a live, onstage burlesque show. think old school western whore house, punk rock chicks scantily clad in lingerie grinding and strutting in the midst of much mayhem, scandal and murder. all this and more for only $5, 21&up. it's going to be held at mccormicks on 18th st. in shockoe bottom of richmond, va on sat. may 15th. it's going to be totally fucking awesome, so if you're anywhere near the vicinity, YOU SHOULD COME. email me with any additional inquiries (

and...that will be all.

 stranded at the intersection    2004-03-23 10:46:14 ET
so i jumped out of an airplane sunday. it was quite possibly the most bizaare experience of my life, and if not that, definitely the most fun. we almost didn't get to go because there were 35mph winds but right at sunset, the last possible jumping point of the day, they geared us up, loaded us into the tiny winged chariot of death and flew us up 13,000ft. the flight up took about 10mins. of anticipatory glances at the disappearing ground and nervous squeezes to my knee by my best friend/free falling comrade, levit. but then when we reached elevation everything happened faster than i can even remember. i know we scooted up to the open door of the plane, all i could see out of it was a blanket of grey clouds, then bill (levit's significant other) disappeared out the door--i saw his face first, his eyes fluttered backwards into his head, his mouth opened in shock, he turned his head away from the gushing wind and then he was gone, vanished into thin air the second he leaned forward--and then i jumped out five seconds later. there wasn't much time to think of anything, but on the way out i briefly turned back, looked at my anxious levit creeping towards the door and shouted "like pianos falling from the sky, levit! i fucking love you!" and then i was a goner as well. i jumped out face first (not sideways like bill and levit) so i barrel rolled into the sky. the first thing i remember was that the clouds we jumped into were gone instantly and then there was ground to the right of me, then the left, then above me, then finally below. and then i was falling, falling, falling.

only it never felt like falling. it was like the pressure of the air was holding me up and i was just soaring against it. we fell at 180mph at first but then a small parachute device opens that is nowhere near enough to save you but enough to slow you down to about 120mph. it was -14 degrees in the air when we jumped and that plus the 120mph wind chill was the coldest thing i have ever experienced in my life. (we had been cold to the bone all day long as we waited, but this made all that shivering look like a suana.) the free fall went on for almost a minute and although it ended much sooner than i had expected, it was still a really long time. i just kept watching the ground rush at me faster and faster. i didn't tense up, i opened my arms and embraced the sensation and i was smiling huge the whole time. i had a million thoughts: is this what it's like to die falling? how similar is this to suicide? let's pretend the parachute isn't going to open or isn't there at all, how different does that feel? wow, check out that sunset. where the hell are bill and levit? this is as free as i will ever feel in my entire life. this is fucking FUN. i'm not falling, i'm hanging in the air (hang like a star, fucking glow in the dark for all the desperate eyes to see) and it'll take another plane to come pluck me from the sky and return me to the ground.

when the parachute opened, i wasn't ready for it yet, was having too much fun rushing towards hypothetically imminent death. as soon as the parachute opened the roaring wind disappeared and everything was perfectly quiet and peaceful. the first thing i said aloud was "awww" in disappointment that the initial rush was over. second was, "this is the most fun i've ever had." the cold didn't disappear on the way down and by the time i reached 2,000ft. my hands were frozen stiff to the point that i could not hold onto the parachute controls. i had planned on landing and running to my friends/roommates who were awaiting with cameras and campagne, but i was so cold when i got down that i immediately ran inside to the bathroom and put my numb hands under hot water. the pain as i regained feeling was intense. then bill and levit came in and we all marveled at how fucking unbelievable that experience was. hell, i'm still marvelling. i recommend this to one and all (it is, quite unfortunately, nowhere near as scary as i thought, so don't let that dissuade you) and will DEFINITELY go again myself sometime. next time i'll pick a much, much warmer date, however.
1 comment

 shutupshutupshutupshutupshutup    2004-03-08 05:30:32 ET
well, my pc has officially died so who knows how much i'll be around from now on. i'm in the library at school right now. i actually came to campus an hour early so i could get one of these really delicious st. pat's menthe choc coffees from the globalizing whore that is starbucks (it's not enough that there's one on every block--they have to have one inside the damn library, too) as i caught up online, but then i got here and realized that i left my wallet at home. doubleplusfuck.

anydamnway. what's been up, what's been up?...trying to cram in the whole semester's worth of work at the last moment. this week is midterms, i've got thesis papers and things of the like due, so i'm busybusybusy (at least in theory--we all know i'm spending the majority of my time loafing around my house and hanging out with my friends, right? right). then after this final week of torture it's spring break. hell yes. i need this. there are two shows this weekend in danville; both the bands of my best friends there are playing. i've got to work saturday so i'll miss the one friday night, but i'll be there in time to rock out to the cd release party of the voxals ( so fun times, that. then i'll probably do a week of way too much alcohol and whatever other vices i can get my hands on followed up by my first sky diving experience on the last day of spring break. that's gonna be some craziness.

oh, and in other fun news: looks like my darling leviticus and i are going to be promoting a party! like, fo'real. we talked to our friend mac who owns mccormicks and he's agreed to let us throw a theme party at his bar. we're going to get a couple of bands to play, do a fuckload of promoting and then mac will reap the benefits of however much alcohol attendees buy and levit and i will get all money made at the door. how dope will it be if we pull this off well? very.

the only other fun thing i can think of to mention is that i cut my hair into a mohawk and dyed it. i got bored with the stopsign red bob layered over black. if i knew how to post pics i would, but alas....

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