2003-02-26 16:16:11 ET

I've been thinking, and what i have come to the conclusion of is that i am ready to live on my own... Really ready. now all i need is a job.. hum.
25 comments

2003-02-19 18:05:12 ET

Havent been up to much .. lots and lots of class.. Going to pheonix tomorrow with RIkki tomorrow.. woot..
Hum.. 4 DAY WEEKEND.. woo hoo.. :)
43 comments

Ok i am bitter
2003-02-13 18:52:59 ET

The bitter cold of this day
I want to run but I have to stay
The life of happiness seems so rough
It is too hard I am not that tough
Stop the pain I feel inside
Kill it now it needs to die
The day may warm but I still feel cold
I haven’t heard a word, its like I was never told
Life seems too much to take
Shatter the glass watch it brake
Warm tears run down my face
I don’t really feel it not even keep pace
I want to leave my life here and now
Just to hard and I wont allow

© Crystal Caulfield
32 comments

2003-02-13 18:24:37 ET

GOD I AM BITTER!!!!

2003-02-13 16:57:57 ET




HI
26 comments

DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!
2003-02-12 10:10:18 ET

OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MiLK JUST SPLASHED IN MY EYE...
5 comments

2003-02-11 20:14:31 ET

I need to go to bed..d amn it damn ti all to hell.... gah to fumble fingeer
4 comments

All i want is...
2003-02-11 19:35:46 ET

All i want is to be beautiful. or feel it any way. to be told by some one besides my family and friends that i am pretty. I want some one who loves me, in the romantic sence, to say it.. i know its all wishful thinking or what ever but i want to be loved.. I dont know why i am so depressed about it really. but i am ... and it hurts so much some times that i dont even think i am going to make it through the day. but i always manage to do so. maybe not service with a smile but atleast i am living it out with out trying to die. I used to be like that, wanting to die, but i just am not any more. though some times i wish that something will just let me die, kill me or something. I want to be beautiful, and happy, and not have thoughts like i have.
I want to be in love, i have never had that. never been inlove.. not once. i know that many are like me, or so i expect but is it to much to ask to be loved by some one other than family and friends. maybe, i dont know. i mean there is God who loves me. but i dont know. i am rambling a lot and i dont knwo why. but i will move on.
so how any way. its hard i know it is, i deal with the pain of it all the time. but i dont kow. goodness i am going to cry. egad..
bye
Crys
20 comments

All with the yeah and the YAY.. blah
2003-02-10 17:45:51 ET

well went to sv today to visit brenna, and give her a card.. she is such a cool sis.
i am so bored with life.. i need some more fun.. cant wait for the 20th because of roado day.. yeah that will be fun.. be cause yeah.. i get the 20 the 21 the weekend off woo.. i am goin to pheonix with rikki cause i wanna dammit.. man this is kinda incoherent but thats ok.. so tired.. adn fumble fingers today so dont mind my spelling even though some people tend to get all peived with the bad spelling but foooook them.. yeah.. and foook you too.. yay.. love you guys.. iam just tire.d..d..d.. wootkkl.. tlkj,... so yeah.. i am just sitting at home being bored to my brain and sleep would bew good.. ...

bye bye


The dictators/ savage beat.. yes..

now wire/: dot dash... woot
5 comments

Mostly random thought process.
2003-02-07 14:28:58 ET

I am rearanging my room it will be cool.. I Hope rikki is still coming.. i need to call and ask.. but i do hope she is.. cause i miss her..
i am going to just type random thoughts so yeah. blah and i just want to have fun need 5000 dollars cause i want to move to california. that way it will give me enough to get an apartment and get settled so i can get a job. i really want to move to cali, i miss the beach.. i like the beach, swiming is fun.. i swam in the middle of march the first time i was in california and yeah it was nice... mission beach has a lot of broken shells and i cut up my poor little feet.. eep.. feet are grody.. i am slow on the thinking end of my brain.. so this is quite randome so yeah get over the thought process of it all yeas yre.s..d aisduojl.. and yeha....
well i need to finish laundry and my room.. i miss rikki.. i want her to move here then we could move to california to gether that would be cool.. love my life right.. boring right down to the day i die well at least thats what i think.... right..

Love ya guys..
Crys
31 comments

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