I ain't never here no mo'
2005-12-15 07:15:24 ET

I'm always on this one obscure blogsite that you may, but most likely haven't, heard of. It's called MYSPACE.COM. Yeah, I know, doesn't ring a bell. Well, for the most part it's wanky, but shit, all my friends are on it. So that's where I be. SO COME AND HIT ME UP AND ADD ME AND ALL THAT, 'CAUSE I KNOW ALL Y'ALL IS ON IT!!!!!!!!

http://www.myspace.com/daniel_issac_assimov


or, if this is easier, find my bitch-ass using my email:

ganjabeans@hotmail.com.


PACE!!!!
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Some emails I wrote to people lately...
2005-10-25 18:17:18 ET

To Steve Moore (who produces the worst comic strip in syndication "In The Bleachers"):

I've written to you before in the hopes that perhaps my scathing criticism would somehow lower your psychological state to the point where you find that you cannot continue your work as a "comic-strip 'artist.'" Evidently that hasn't been the case, as you continue to produce your terrible work to even greater acclaim (ie: possible animated show on ESPN). That's unfortunate, and I offer no congratulations.

You are a rip-off. You are a plagerist. Your style is xeroxed from The Far Side AND YOU KNOW IT!!! I doubt a blind person would have difficulty seeing this all-too-evident fact. You have no original style whatsoever. And the humor of your comics is nothing short of LAME! Everyday, you produce the most rudimentary, boring, pointless, and all-around stupid comics, IN THE STYLE OF SOMEONE ELSE!!! If I was Gary Larson, I would kick the living-shit out of you. You didn't just rip-off some random comic strip, you ripped-off one of the greatest (and widely recognizable) comic strips ever put into syndication

You suck. You really do. Why can't you just retire? How long do you intend on syndicating this crap? You, and anyone remotely similiar to you, make me want to commit suicide for lack of confidence in my fellow man. You are pathetic.

You're not an artist - You are a rip-off. Don't forget that, you asshole.


To Shadow Huntaz (a hip-hop production team who has some of my favorite music, but horrible MCs):

I FUCKING LOVE your production. Your music is a dream come true. Your sound is the answer to the question I've been asking forever, which is something like "why can't there be dark, futuristic, experimental hip-hop that isn't cheesy." You guys make that shit, and for that, I love you.

The only thing I gots to say is that your MCs suck. I mean, shit, with your sound, you could get the tightest American MCs you want, but instead you stick with these guys. I don't know if it's 'cause you got that wierd British knack for opting on less-than-ideal MCs, but seriously, your MCs gotta go.

I recommend you get some Toastie Taylor or some Big Jus or some Aesop. I mean, shit, you guys can afford it, right?


...more to come! I'M ON A MUTHAFUCKIN' MISSION TO SPEAK MY FUCKING MIND Y'ALL!!!

=(
2005-10-17 18:09:21 ET

NO MORE MEANINGLESS SEX!

I'm fucking sick of it. I'm sick of feeling empty. I'm sick of feeling guilty. I'm sick of telling people that it was a one-time thing and I'm not interested in a relationship (or friendship). I'm sick of feeling like a fucking slut. I'm sick of knowing that I allow these things to happen because of an absence of meaning in my life. I'M FUCKING SICK OF IT!

I'm tripping right now over the mere concept of getting an STD from someone who I don't care about. If I don't knock it off, that's what's going to happen. SO NO MORE! And tomorow, I'm getting tested.

I'm going to make a promise to myself starting yesterday that I will only have intercourse with someone that I AM IN LOVE WITH. Or at least someone that I know well and trust and am strongly interested in.

No more of this meaningless shit. My head is heavy as it is.
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