Army of none    2004-05-26 23:08:40 ET
You ever feel so robbed of your child hood?...I do all the time. I think back to when mom used to lay in her bed crying all night and I lay next to her. It makes me sad to know that she is sad and sometimes I think she is dying in a life to a captor who twist her mind to make himself feel righteous. God, you have shown me the light but have left it to burn me then save me. I cried so many nights to a figure that never even exsited. ..... so much is what goes through my mind in life. My mother told me today to join the army. I thougth about it, at first i said no. But the more I think about it...I think it could help me. I would get two years to travel to Jay in apan and then station. get health benfits. Earn cash that will pay for a car, place to live, and the stuff I want. School be free and I be caught up with living. Them when I get out I get money for school and life and I'm on my road to theater arts. One thin is I hate the army and what they stand for and I feel that I'm going against what I stand for. Plus I can get away from my family and this dead state. I feel that I'm a Chrysanthemum dying with a hand full of others in this state. One where vanity is envloping the life and replacing humanity with more clones.

I apperciate it if people give me their feed back if I should join the air foce or army ??? I feel aslo that I'm an artist and revolutionist not an grunt for a faceless force.

Rasputina- Mr E. Leon Rauis

 Bunker Vs. Perversion    2004-05-25 22:54:43 ET
Like it says folks who's going ?? I might be going but not sure yet because I got free tickets to human drama one night and rasputina on sunday. I love rasputina so magical *sigh* why do they put good things togher ?? So yeah who is going ?? cause I need a ride if someone like to help out ??Well today was weird but great. I cleaned up around the house, went to pick stuff at main place, went to the galaxy got tickets went to buy tickets for rasputina but a deal was going on that if we bought human drama we get rasputina tickets for free. I can't say no to free hahaha and i heard human drama is great. Also my friend got free tickets for just being there. I went home took a shower, went to soup plantation where some Christian lady read my shirt that read " jesus hates me". She was like "jesus does not hate you...even with your piercing..didn't you know jesus had piercings..." to which I remarked " I know, but I'm athesist and my dads a pastor I've heard it all." I tried to ignore her at first but she pushed for it. Sheena and me laughed all through dinner about the Christians. We went to watch after words " A day with out a mexican " that movie sucked ass. Don't watch it...Also i feel like I'm missing out on so much on art like artist new age one like johen or serious stuff that twisted. Anyone know of any good artist ?? or music sites anything intresting along these line ......jrock, deathrock,industrial, goth, murders, anime, art and so on ?? well thanks all

P.S Does anybody know how to do these??

I need help trying to do this...

1 comment

 Lucid eyes never felt so lost...    2004-05-24 00:03:26 ET
I feel I'm at a creative block...lately my ex has been raining on my parade and westminster there is not much to be inspired by or learn about when you've done it 1.36 million times over. I do like going to hardware stores and clothing and making things. Micahel and pearls are two good place for materials humm swapmeet to heheheh...wish some more shows where coming up... I need a car to get out feel so trapped blah blah my digital also broke today how sad is that. I got this one crappy photo that does not justice for me uggghhh one day.

Rasputina - Mr. E leaon Rauis

 I got married    2004-05-17 23:13:57 ET
Okay, I didn't really get married but my ex took me to Reno to watch her bestfriend get married. We drove like fucking 10 hours to get up there. We drove in pitch black forest that was creepy because it lookded like you could murder someone and dump their body out there. I like it heheheh. We got to reno at like 3 am and went to sleep but before bed we had a nice bed time story of what was going on. I guess the groom was best friend with my ex's friends bf. So when she dumped him. The groom asked her to marry him that day because they had been going out behinde his bestfriend back because he loved her. Drama broke out that they whole SF rockabilly crew they had would never talk to him anymore. So the grooms friend in Reno took him in and thats where we stayed. The next morning or today we got dressed went to the court house got marriage linscen's and went to a quick chapel. Let me tell you it was cheesy but I loved it. We went to a buffet and after that left to come home. I got sick yeah !! See if I got married it would be the on halloween but in tranysilvania. I heard a good idea of mexico and the day of the dead but what be better then the place with vampires yeahhhhh so delicious...

 Heart Transplant    2004-05-14 08:31:45 ET
So yesterday my heart jumped out of my chest !! I got a respirator from homedepot and I'm all kinds of excited. It looks all futeristic and cool. Besides that I've been feeling down. I need a car and need to make friends in the surrounding area. I feel like I don't have much but that proably me...I need to keep to it and push on Gerixx always says make lemons into lemonade and I'm trying hard with no friend or anyone right now....

Jump to page: [Previous] 1 « 19 20 21 22 23 [Next]
Back to HelterHeart's page