I found this the dead has words we hear every day    2005-06-14 09:43:46 ET
So I took a second and realized who the true friends, not those who've kissed my ass to get in my club. To get in free where they can ?? no, its the people who have had my back at my lowest point. I'm still dead and my black blood pumping. You may leave me like the crows after a feast. Yet I may be talking and you may not be listing but you hear my words even though the eyes do not connect you just run scared like the rest. So know this is only the begging. I have so much more to bring the dead !! Music is my passion and Art and you will see...that you thought you knew me but all you knew was shit !! only the true friends know me.

 Funny as hell !!    2005-06-13 23:57:22 ET
suffocatingsmile: I just did something fun
nightresss677: ?
suffocatingsmile: called an escort and talked to her for fun !!
nightresss677: ...
nightresss677: are you kidding?
suffocatingsmile: no it was so funny
suffocatingsmile: i was laughing and like
suffocatingsmile: hey
suffocatingsmile: whats going on
suffocatingsmile: she like I speak greek
suffocatingsmile: and I was thats cool
suffocatingsmile: I speak japnesse
suffocatingsmile: she like its 200 hundred to speak greek
suffocatingsmile: I was like wow
suffocatingsmile: i went to community college
suffocatingsmile: to get mine and payed 50
suffocatingsmile: shes all getting mad
suffocatingsmile: and I was like so what losers call you for this shit
suffocatingsmile: and she was like you going to pay
suffocatingsmile: I was like nope soryr
suffocatingsmile: was board and wanted to call
suffocatingsmile: lol
nightresss677: How long did she talk to you? lol
suffocatingsmile: like for 15 mins
suffocatingsmile: lol
nightresss677: hahah
nightresss677: you must be really bored...
suffocatingsmile: yes
suffocatingsmile: but it was quite amusing
suffocatingsmile: to bother hookers
suffocatingsmile: dead hookers are even bettter
nightresss677: true..
nightresss677: they cant talk back..
nightresss677: lol
suffocatingsmile: haha
suffocatingsmile: yes they can not
suffocatingsmile: but just like live girls
suffocatingsmile: you still got by them flowers
nightresss677: hahaha
nightresss677: yeah but they cant bitch about how they arent the right color.
nightresss677: ^_^
suffocatingsmile: awww..so funny
suffocatingsmile: i need to find myself a nice dark girl like me
nightresss677: you said it yourself youre too picky
nightresss677: what are you looking for?
suffocatingsmile: gothic makeup stylized ym
suffocatingsmile: a dark gothic girl who got part s of you and take time to look good like me
suffocatingsmile: petite can be a little husky
suffocatingsmile: great personality
suffocatingsmile: suportive
suffocatingsmile: like rough wild sex and aventrous
suffocatingsmile: and into bdsm

 Knife fight to the Death    2005-06-13 09:03:02 ET
So I feel since taking DJing jobs more serious that I've taken a war all out on anyone. Not by choice, but by forced decision. I sorta feel like I stand alone and can't trust anyone. Sorta alienate from the people I once knew. It's hard to trust others with actions when they do the opposite. Or when they turn and on you or talk about you behinde your back. Nobody in general, but with everything that has happend everyone seems so shifty. It's like question of trusting them or not. Given the actions that go back and forth. Just seems like people are being cutthroats then helping out. but again its bussiness but it should not take personal live into or pot shots. Something alot of people aren't good of decfering by themselves. *sigh* I just wish people where cool and not making so much BS and I do my best to ignore it but even the closest of people seem like they are turning. It feels that way, but I'm going to keep y mouth shut do my job and ignore it all. The true people, will stick by my side. Some have and its been great.At times it my feel lonely but others it feels like i have tons of friends heheheh sorta feels better. I won't take shit lying down. I will fight tooth and nail for DJing because I love it and being screwed or screwing people out won't happen. So I still got my finger up sayng fuck you and fuck your bullshit world. I ain't done till I fucking die !!
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 Poor and Famous    2005-06-09 09:10:42 ET
I really want some money for clothing. Was looking at clothing and was bummed I did not have enough to get something. Le shigh....damn me and clothing uggghhhh..

 Recap of things to come...    2005-06-06 07:57:28 ET
Stab, drab, and zombies are rad. I spent friday stuck on a street in LA thanks to childish antics that could of hurt people. Got a ride home took sometime to reflect on life then went to bed afer my smoke. I woke up saturday to work. Computers totally crashed, so got sent home early went to get my friends some shades for her room. Then I went to get computer fixed and blah turns out hard drive was fried so that upset me. Went to DJ for redlight kick off party. It was a smash and I loved it had so much fun. I can't wait to open the industrial room at redlight they told me I'd be playing openning night. Also Ronin wrote me back and offered to DJ for us anytime we wanted. Sunday, got a new hard drive for 160 gigs and only for 50 bucks. I was really excited and happy with most the stuff, sunday I drove to Club london and hung out with new friend Rachel.Besides that enjoaybel drama free time.
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