fun    2002-12-23 14:38:45 ET
last night = Storm&DeathByDesign&Digit sammich!!!

i came home from work and was all like 'honey, i'm home' and justine's all like 'digit's in bed with another girl!' you guys had me scared for a second there...

i am making mighty strides in my story plot. this is only the beginning...

 strange birds    2002-12-22 06:07:12 ET
apparently there's a whole lot of stuff that i missed; wish i had gone to q's with the crew but unfortunately i was working... i have to work again in like an hour or so...

yesterday myself and Digit and Anima Infirmary left the house to try and cash my paycheck, which took me a month to get. i kept getting turned down & pissed off until Insomnia helped out... then we went to get breakfast at this great 50's diner called "johnny rockets"...

you know, Digit will agree with me, that the strangest goddamned things happen around us when we are out. the entire diner staff ended up dancing to "stayin alive" when it came on the jukebox, i'm not kidding, someone was in the back strobing the lights on/off, and there were about 12 of the kitchen/wait staff lined up in the dining room doing the same orchestrated travolta-esque dance... i felt like i had accidentally tripped a switch and turned my life into a musical::

then we went to the army store... i was upset that Insomnia hadnt called after work but then realized my cell phones batteries were dead: we were supposed to hang out with Izzy's friend Al or something but he left work early. Stopped into 8th Street Lab (a raver clothing store) and said hi to my pineapple head/graver friend Zack...

then another strange thing happened:: we went to kmart and the guy in the line next to us (a customer) picked up the intercom and said
"Attention Kmart shoppers, for the next 15 minutes, everything is FREE. So bring yo' shit up to the nearest register and i'll hook ya up"

this created general chaos; and another announcer came on apologizing for our 'inconvenience'; any idiot would have known it was a joke but kmart shoppers are not your garden variety idiots...

we bought snackies and went home to watch 'institute benjamenta' but me and Digit were so tired we just passed out; and now i woke up and its time for work, rats... where did my weekend go...

Day 2 of not drinking has been completed.

when do i get my gold star?

---another thing:: i'm beginning to regret cutting my hair; i want my long hair back. this sucks.

----Izzy is having nightmares & i dont know why.

 rivetcorp strikes again    2002-12-20 08:55:30 ET

spent an evening w/ Doktor242 at my former employer's christmas party. Unfortunately, the woman who fired me did not have the guts to show her ugly face. Rats. The stockbroker i like to hit on didnt show up either. Double rats.

I did, however, consume mass quantities of free alcohol at the bar (i think my drink count hit the double digits) but i dont remember, i was so trashed at the end of it i passed out on two trains and</> the company van, good thing i dont work there anymore and have no one in particular to impress.

in other news I AM NOT DRINKING ANY ALCOHOL FOR SIX WEEKS the dry spell starts today. this sounds ridiculous but it's not ridiculous yet because this is the first time i've officially, publicly (and not just while slumped over in a subway station wanting to die). I'm not sure if this dry spell can reasonably encompass new year's... maybe its going to end up being a new years resolution instead. but if you see me drinking, hit me...

i've come with a lot of progress in the story i'm writing and if any of the brain cell's i'm sacrificing to alcohol can be used to fill in the small plot inconsistencies that are left, this is so worth it. plus, i'm pissed that i missed much of the Genesis P'orridge show being trashed, thats when i got this idea.

wish me luck guys.



     2002-12-17 16:45:33 ET
i remade the page:: dont know if it will stay this way.

lets see... its good to be on again, theyre taking super long with the DSL installation so i made a fake aol account... for the next week or so my screen name is keygen1023... But i missed you guys alot; i think im just going to stalk all my friend's pages for the next hour instead of making a long entry.

not much new stuff is going on; i attended a Genesis P'Orridge show in Midtown the other night... Digit and Anima Infirmary (it was animas idea) were there too.. the experience was hard to explain; it was in this super fucking cool loft-type space, everything was painted white and there were rope swings and leopard couches and foam noodles and vodka... it defies me to convey the magic there but Digit saw it. i wish it could have been Saturday night forever.

i need to sleep.

two things i must quit before they kill me::

-Instant Messenger


People (specifically boys) was supposed to be on that list but they bought themselves some more time.

i really regret getting that trashed at the Genesis show:: there were mad cool ppl there and i wanted to socialize. wanted to... now keep in mind i dont drink when i'm at home, by myself. but when i go out i cant just get buzzed.. i have to get trashed. i dont know if i should take it as a warning sign but the memory lapses have kept on; i'll attribute those on sleep deprivation and lack of vitamins.

brain no workie.

i go bed now.

 few and far between:    2002-12-06 23:37:22 ET
at W2zone right now... all night LAN par-tay.

Users Biomechanic and Wintermute blew off to go to QXT's in New Jersey... so its just myself and Digit here... and Insomnia, well that doesnt count b/c she works here...

i havent been up to anything except for working nonstop day and night to get out of debt; i borrowed money to get myself & Insomnia the apartment... my only free time is for reading on trains... I havent been on in awhile, if you guys could update me on what i'm missing out on.. apparently Biomechanic gets more responses when he hacks my page than when i post journal entries:: maybe i should just let him take over...

erm lessee... I just finished a long-assed book "the art of dramatic writing" by lajos egri... its a very involved and difficult read... (i'm trying to write a comic book story and not make a jack ass of myself, you see). for some lighter reading i have purchased "The Matrix and Philosophy" which includes articles like 'Neo-Materialism and the Death of the Subject', 'Real Genre and Virtual Philosophy', and 'Religion of the Matrix and Problems of Pluralism'. This, to me, is recreation. no wonder the left side of my face occaisionally twitches and i jump when sudden noise occurs. i can only hope that i can translate all this literary garbage into something of substance.. i may have said this before but my lack of time before wasn't real... it was just a perceived lack of time. now i can consider myself lucky if i have time to shower and clean my room before going back to work. i'm also developing a severe discipline problem with waking up on time...

whats even better is that its colder than a motherfucker outside, quite frankly i'm not really feeling this christmas thing whatsoever. the best is the snow that gets the residue of car exhaust on it and turns black at the edges. yummy. i dont know how i'm hanging in there; i miss my freedom; i miss my friends, i dont like having to hop transit turnstiles to survive... after christmas i'm begging for my job at the bank back. i could console myself by saying ive learned some type of lesson but i honestly believe that not all experiences have value:: some are just miserable and unnecessary.

i think im going to make a list of all the things i intend to do because time is more precious than i thought.

we should be getting DSL back in our apartment somewhere around the 12th...

a million billion friend points if you read all this.

Jump to page: [Previous] 1 « 9 10 11 12 13 » 25 [Next]
Back to death by design's page