Moon desires.    2004-10-28 19:43:57 ET
For a mind that lives in the dark, the most beautiful light that pleases our instinct nature is the moonlight. The moon has been showing very well lately and quite admirable. So much a human can do inspired only by its light, from poems to sonatas and canvases. Keep shining moonlight.

I doní know I why said the above things, I just felt like writing it. Well, in other issues, I have to say that Iíve been watching a tv program lately, that I can describe it as cute. Really, I find it amusingly nice and I like it. Itís called ďThe Worst WitchĒ and itís about an academy for girls who want to become witches; the main plot is about the situations of a girl whoís always blamed for the bad thing that happens there since she didnít become from a family of witches (like the others), so she has her group of friends supporting her and dealing with her nemesis (another girl and a very disciplined teacher [so adorable her black gowns and cold attitude]). So the show may sound quite corny or obvious but I still find it amusingly cute and fun.

Halloweenís approaching. I find it adorable a day to fantasize with witches and such. I wish you all have a nice Halloween.

 A day of the week.    2004-10-25 19:18:53 ET
The friend I talked about apparently isnít doing very well, he had to be interned in the hospital again; thatís got to suck, itís awful, I hope he gets well soon, heís perhaps the only Ďsubculturedí friend I have at the moment. Mmh... well, I hope he gets well soon.

The audio problem is still a fact, I donít know how to solve it. It keeps being interrupted, perhaps it has to do something with the memory because it sounds like if it was using a lot of memory or something, maybe Iíll have to reinstall WinMe again, and just when I was getting exited by finally listening internet radio with broadband. There are really good stations from Goth and Metal to Classical, quiet nice.

Well I better go to bed and try to rest so I wont have problems keeping awake tomorrow like I did today. I donít know what happened, I went to bed yesterday at 11 or 12 like always, and today at morning I was dying of sleep at all classes, I felt really damn tired I barely could keep my eyes open. Iím must rest now then.

 scythe    2004-10-23 20:26:49 ET
The thing with the internet here is somehow better, but still not what we want. I finally got internet in my new computer (in my room) and with WinMe, and we connected it the other two in LAN, but now the problems is that internet, we canít make it have internet in 3 computers, itís either in one or in another but not in the 3 at the same time, donít know why, but itís probably because of we havenít configured it well, or maybe itís the hub or the connection, whatever, I guess weíll have to call the computer guy again.
Well, so at least I now have internet in my room, but now the other problem that really bugs me is that it has a problem with the audio, either in a midi or an mp3, whenever audio is being played it has like interferences or something and the audio cuts for little whiles. Mmh, how to explain it? Itís like if it had hiccups..., yes, like that, Iím listening to an mp3 or something and it plays it well but with some little pauses about every 20 seconds or sometimes every minute, like if it had hiccups; itís really annoying I canít enjoy from a complete track at all because itís always interrupted for those tiny pauses, I donít know whatís causing it, but itsí annoying.

In other news, a friend of mine is recovering from an appendix surgery he had about a weak ago. Apparently he had been having a lot of aches and went with different doctors but they only said itíd be just some stomachache or something, but at the end it ended being a problem with the appendix and to be interned. Heís now in his home but still quite fragile. Damn, Iíve never had a surgery but it must sucks. I hope he gets well soon, I need a billiard mate.

 Psychosomatic addict insane.    2004-10-20 20:37:13 ET
Today I got fucking mad in the rehearsal. As usual, on Wednesdays the director goes off and he leave his son, the principal of cellos, in charge of the orchestra, so he was conducting and as usual the becomes really a pain in the ass when he does that because he just shows off a lot trying to tell everyone how to play their instrument, believing heís the all mighty virtuoso in there; when it came the part of a violin solo I played he showed his cocky face saying that I didnít played well and a bunch of bullshit of how to play like he wants (not like it should better be), fuck him, he practically scold me and criticized me in front of all the orchestra. Fuck it. I didnít play around, I did try to perform the solo part with my best and he just reprimanded me like that; shit on him, I know I didnít play it like a damn concert master but, fuck it, I neither played that horrible.
So fucking shit on it, bitchasses, so no one likes me, Iím still the fucked up black sheep, no one needs or depends of me, nor misses me for something, so Iím fucking futile here, huh? I damn wish I could just go, what would anyone care? So everyone is the same without me, huh? Iím just here to be their pain in the ass, fuck it then, I wish Iím the stone on the way of all their ass fucked lives.
Fuck it, I donít know if Iím mad or terrible sad and decayed for the moment, I do know that I'm tired of trying to do my best for nothing; someone kill my breath, I just want to close my eyes, Iím off to sleep.

 goes on... wonder where.    2004-10-18 20:04:31 ET
I did get a few hugs on my birthday. Nothing special, I donít like the feeling of feeling rewarded by doing nothing, I just accomplished more years of being alive.
Whatever, at the end I didnít get to be the concertino ĖI noticed some glances telling me not being good for that place-, whatever, fuck it.
Iím now the thing of changing the winXp to winMe, and asking about how to put the internet to work well in that computer, apparently itís better with a router-modem thing. Mmh... why so much shite for these stuff?
Well, what else? I donít know. I guess Iím Ďsomehowí back to normal, that is being either apathetic or angsty or sad, and for dessert the daily depression for all nights.
I saw some like pumpkin toys to stick in the windows of the car for Halloween, I want one but of bat, I think itíll look better with a bat.

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