2002-09-12 08:05:11 ET Feelings: indescribable Music: blah blah blah lots of stuff 10 Days Away!!! and its my birthday! Yea! - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I had a dream the other night. It s the ~3~ year anniversary of one of the most horrible things that ever happened to my heart. It was broken...for the first time, in that way. Anyways, I hadn t even thought about it. I had that dream and I know it was sitting in the back of my head somewhere. It still bothers me to this day. Peter and I have reached a really good part in our relationship. I hope he sees how much I care for him. I wish I could find new ways to show him. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - FALL IS HERE!!! I have a VERY deep connection to autumn. I don t know why, it may have to do with the fact that I was born on the first day of fall.... I get these strange butterflies in my stomach. I wake up in the morning with a smile on my face that won t go away. I feel......weird.......I can t explain the feelings that I have. I get excited about the thoughts of the falling leaves and the almost bare trees. The wind blowing through the branches and stirring up this strong wooded scent. The taste of the dead leaves on my breath. GARGH!!! I love it! ~purr~ I know that it does stay warm for quite awhile still. I can t help but think that when the temperature drops the way that it has in the last two days, I know it s on the way. In my heart it is already here and I am going to start enjoying it now before it s over. ~sigh~ (just imagine my head resting on my hand with a vacant sappy look on my face) 3 comments

:(

2002-09-08 18:56:54 ET Im tired and hed achy. I am also tired of my boifriend, who likes to talk to grrls that look, act and dress a LITTLE too much like me. I will kill them. 10 comments

2002-09-07 10:34:29 ET Got this from Huskarl! I REALLY want to do this!!!http://www.rosemortem.com/postmortem/deathwheelz/ Anyone from St Louis? or at least close by? 5 comments

Om my goodness. I ll be 23 in 16 days!

2002-09-06 07:13:32 ET So , When I turned 17 I hit this black hole in my life...well a blackhole persay. I met a lot of new people. I smoked a lot of pot. Listened to ICP, smoke cigarettes and my life stopped. I was stuck at the age of 17 for about 3 years. Thats when I realized it. I m not a kid anymore. I have to start taking on resposibilities. Move out becaome an adult. One problem. I have to catch up with myself. Then I turned 21. That helped. I could actually do adult like things. I still feel myself struggling to become an adult. Everyday I grow older the further behind I become. I look at these "kids" that come into my store and shop. They look 13 and 14 years old, when some of them are seniors in high school. JUST SO YOU KNOW, THIS IS NOT A RANT ON HOW IM TOO OLD. I DON T WANT TO HEAR ANYONE SAY YOUR AS OLD AS YOU FEEL, BLAH BLAH BLAH! It makes me feel weird. I just got out of high school......FOUR YEARS AGO!!! Ack! See, I still feel stuck. This is actually something I have been dealing with since I turned 20, the I feel old thing. I know I m not old, but I am definately not a kid anymore. I have met some interesting people in the last few months, very "cool" people and then I find out they are only 19 etc. Its cause people my age are too tired to dress up anymore. Ugh I don t feel like writing anymore. maybe I ll finish later when I feel remember what all I was going to say. Which Spongebob Squarepants Character Are You?? Find out @ blackhole 9 comments

AHHHHI!! BLAH!!!

2002-09-05 20:26:48 ET 17 days until mu birthday!!! I ll be 23...IM SO OLD AND STUFF!!!! 8 comments

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